tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-91390390150335280472024-03-12T19:27:00.786-04:00Tonight, on "The Dukes" A Dukes of Hazzard Review BlogJay Dukehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15329005721647143286noreply@blogger.comBlogger32125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139039015033528047.post-53356233820744429752020-08-01T23:15:00.001-04:002020-08-02T00:06:20.539-04:00New Logo! Same Great Taste!<div><em><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">In which the author settles in for some humble pie...</span></em></div>
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<div><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Look! A fresh, new logo! </span></div><div><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-aN52syEpIIM/XyY1XG0bBxI/AAAAAAAABSI/xjow3EcO6z4h4NXL_ZqFypg1LfUjaMmnQCLcBGAsYHQ/s800/blog_logo2.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Oooh." border="0" data-original-height="211" data-original-width="800" height="169" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-aN52syEpIIM/XyY1XG0bBxI/AAAAAAAABSI/xjow3EcO6z4h4NXL_ZqFypg1LfUjaMmnQCLcBGAsYHQ/w640-h169/blog_logo2.png" width="640" /></a></div><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">So yesterday, about 5:30 PM, my longtime friend Walt texted me a Dukes question, in the following exchange:</span></div>
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<div style="padding-left: 30px;"><span style="font-family: "courier new", courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><strong>W:</strong> Did Boss Hogg ever dress in drag?</span></div>
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<div style="padding-left: 30px;"><span style="font-family: "courier new", courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><strong>ME:</strong> Not to my knowledge. But he did once play his own twin brother, Jefferson Davis Hogg, who dressed in black, and was as good and honest as Boss was crooked.</span></div>
<div style="padding-left: 30px;"><span style="font-family: "courier new", courier, monospace; font-size: large;"> </span></div>
<div style="padding-left: 30px;"><span style="font-family: "courier new", courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><strong>W:</strong> I recall that. I have someone else that remembered him in drag. At the least, I have a real Mandela Effect thing going on!</span></div>
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<div><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Tonight, I was screwing around on my phone, and decided to randomly do a search for “Boss Hogg in dress” and came across <a href="http://hazzardnet.com/forums/topic/5981-daisy-dukes/?do=findComment&comment=181366">the following forum post at hazzard net.com</a>:</span></div>
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Looks like Roger Duke put as much thought into his handle as I did." src="https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/5dOJwQL3eVd21I2aVNh387ax8EsIxoUSbnnxoen_GNRvXzX4WeeU1zdImCspKP0=d" style="border-width: 2px;" title="Looks like Roger Duke put as much thought into his handle as I did." /></span></div><div></div>
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<div><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">So we had a third person…I had to dig deeper. I next searched for “Boss Hogg in drag,” which, along with not-as-many-as-I-would think drag queens, gave this result:</span></div>
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<div><span style="clear: right; float: right; font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img alt="What a drag." src="https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/wEzLJlHUCiarSKUAC8gLhRruo6fxh9cosU4YkLA4usoKRI2adL1Pm0Mk004i6t8=d" style="border-width: 2px;" title="What a drag." /></span></div>
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<div><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Bingo, visual confirmation.</span></div>
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<div><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">What episode? This image only turned up a handful of times in a Google reverse image search, all on pinterest or the like, and the page there offered no help. Surprisingly “Boss and Rosco in a dress” brought it right up, where “Boss in a dress” did nothing. </span></div>
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<div><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">The episode in question is “Targets: Daisy and Lulu,” the eighth episode of the sixth season, originally aired on Friday, November 18, 1983. Here’s a link to a promo for it</span></div>
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<div><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><iframe allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen" class="embed-responsive-item" frameborder="0" height="385" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/v7oiPhznuhQ" width="640"> </iframe></span></div>
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<div><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Plus, Dallas and Falcon Crest!</span></div>
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<div><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">When I told him about my discovery, his response was:</span></div>
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<div style="padding-left: 30px;"><span style="font-family: "courier new", courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><strong>W:</strong> Mixed emotions here. Vindicated, but I want a Mandela Effect experience.</span></div>
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<div style="padding-left: 30px;"><span style="font-family: "courier new", courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><strong>ME:</strong> Covid breeds strange emotions.'</span></div>
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<div style="padding-left: 30px;"><span style="font-family: "courier new", courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><strong>W:</strong> Quite.</span></div>
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<div><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Quite, indeed.</span></div>
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<div> </div>Jay Dukehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15329005721647143286noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139039015033528047.post-29044204118689293372020-07-29T20:33:00.001-04:002020-07-29T20:33:32.875-04:00Season 2, Episode 9: "Witness for the Persecution" In tonight's episode, <div><br /></div><div>There's a mob boss on trial... </div><div><br /></div><div>Boss Hogg is a witness, so he needs to stay at the Duke farm undercover until he can be secreted away to the trial... </div><div><br /></div><div>He is then a terrible houseguest...</div><div><br /></div><div>Hijinks ensue...</div><div><br /></div><div>vroom vroom.</div>Jay Dukehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15329005721647143286noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139039015033528047.post-74088342932223685362017-06-16T21:54:00.000-04:002017-06-16T21:54:22.428-04:00Coming Soon!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-CnCDD3UKdo0/WUSLoBD8vxI/AAAAAAAABOM/UI-Sc4b80mUxlzpVXmMaGfrkDxZXrh4zQCLcBGAs/s1600/doh_poster.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1067" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-CnCDD3UKdo0/WUSLoBD8vxI/AAAAAAAABOM/UI-Sc4b80mUxlzpVXmMaGfrkDxZXrh4zQCLcBGAs/s320/doh_poster.jpg" width="213" /></a></div>
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I cannot possibly imagine there is anyone still checking to see if this updates, but if there are, stay tuned!Jay Dukehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15329005721647143286noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139039015033528047.post-25487105969851387092014-06-26T21:08:00.001-04:002014-06-26T21:08:38.332-04:00Special Post: “Bo and Luke Use Autotrader.com”<em>In which the General Lee is finally given a rest, and the boys get a new car…</em><br />
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So my wife was telling me about an ad she heard on the radio featuring the Dukes of Hazzard. I was intrigued, and took to the internet to find it. I never did find the radio ad, but I did come across what is probably the visual portion of the same campaign.<br />
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We open with the General Lee being chased by some modern cop cars, being piloted by a much older Bo and Luke, returning to the roles for the first time since 2000’s “Hazzard in Hollywood” TV movie (which I’ll get around to reviewing much, much later).<br /> <br />
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<a href="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-4aTO9EOtJw0/U6zC1F_NePI/AAAAAAAABJk/7A0F07eKGdI/vlcsnap-2014-06-26-18h37m24s5-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="You can really tell this was filmed in a real place, as opposed to a studio backlot."><img border="0" src="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-jyqpVdTTyQU/U6zC11noK7I/AAAAAAAABJo/ltS7p3YUoYU/vlcsnap-2014-06-26-18h37m24s5%25255B6%25255D.png?imgmax=800" height="254" width="335" /></a></div>
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Bo remarks that they’ve still got it, implying (to me, at least) that they once again returned to their non-Hazzard professions of NASCAR driver (Bo) and Smokejumper for the US Forest Service (Luke), as established in 1997’s “Dukes of Hazzard Reunion’ TV movie (again, more on that in the future). I’m thinking they’ve both retired, and returned to Hazzard to live out their days doing as they please, which is apparently running from the police as they did when they were younger men. Luke would presumably be in his early 60s, which is a bit early, but not impossible, and Bo would be in his mid 50s, but if he earned and invested well, and let’s assume he did, he’d be set for life by now.<br /> <br />
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<a href="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-bihjkKogt-s/U6zC2vR1t_I/AAAAAAAABJ0/bFCiWZn4mf4/vlcsnap-2014-06-26-18h36m34s210-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="They're getting up there, but when I met John Schneider in 2009, I was struck by how fit and handsome he still was."><img border="0" src="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-hE8I4Rc-sdc/U6zC3fpJ-bI/AAAAAAAABJ4/MPPY_7X6CpQ/vlcsnap-2014-06-26-18h36m34s210%25255B10%25255D.png?imgmax=800" height="268" width="335" /></a></div>
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Anyhow, Luke says that while <em>they </em>may still have it, the General Lee has seen better days. Bo agrees, noting that today’s police cars are much faster than they used to be, while the cops are right on their tail. Luke says that’s why he’s on Auto Trader, right then and there, on his phone!<br /> <br />
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<a href="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-EXIk_kOhy3s/U6zC5hl7buI/AAAAAAAABKE/23XtkF80nyA/vlcsnap-2014-06-26-20h10m54s43-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title=""><img border="0" src="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-f986AbASSV8/U6zC6RfaQNI/AAAAAAAABKM/3cVgpkEKyvo/vlcsnap-2014-06-26-20h10m54s43.png?imgmax=800" height="214" width="335" /></a></div>
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The cop car gets a little too close and bumps the General Lee from behind, causing the car to go through a fence, and Bo has to back the car out of a pig pen, saying he wishes the General had a backup camera. Luke says that Auto Trader can get you that, too! Bo tells him to make sure to get one where the doors open, to which he replies “I think they all do!” “Really?” exclaims Bo.<br /> <br />
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<a href="http://lh3.ggpht.com/--ddApHZ1XWs/U6zC8Brq5dI/AAAAAAAABKU/8XW_VvWWfMg/vlcsnap-2014-06-26-20h26m13s75-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="Getting in and out of those windows isn't so easy at your age, is it? Now you know how Uncle Jesse felt, may he RIP."><img border="0" src="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-EQRJDRssvtY/U6zC9BZr6cI/AAAAAAAABKc/5IERdD8WWHI/vlcsnap-2014-06-26-20h26m13s75%25255B6%25255D.png?imgmax=800" height="268" width="335" /></a></div>
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I was pleased to note that somebody paid attention and actually gave the cops Georgia plates, even though they don’t even show it for an entire second, I had to go frame-by-frame to get the snapshot.<br /> <br />
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<a href="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-Vap0q1LS2C4/U6zC-4YW7pI/AAAAAAAABKk/_qlEIHqvjPI/vlcsnap-2014-06-26-20h28m31s54-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="That kind of attention to detail is to be commeneded."><img border="0" src="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-dOQzIg3foYo/U6zC_mXkLSI/AAAAAAAABKo/MMz_3SfCF34/vlcsnap-2014-06-26-20h28m31s54%25255B4%25255D.png?imgmax=800" height="254" width="335" /></a></div>
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After the General Lee does a jump and crashes through a barn, Luke ends up with a rooster in his lap, and a disgusted look on his face.<br /> <br />
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<a cocks="" got="" haw="" href="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-5y7PzHJhV8s/U6zDBINZ8yI/AAAAAAAABK0/-viMa0tV0GA/vlcsnap-2014-06-26-20h31m35s215-8x6.png?imgmax=800" i="" now="" rel="thumbnail" title="" two="" ve=""><img border="0" src="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-JtkOXEfUX4Q/U6zDBkRedMI/AAAAAAAABK8/uI3u92RrCw4/vlcsnap-2014-06-26-20h31m35s215%25255B4%25255D.png?imgmax=800" height="239" width="335" /></a></div>
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The sheriff catches up with them and Luke gives him a friendly “Hey, Lonnie!” I guess Rosco must be long retired, unless they’ve called down the thunder of the State Police.<br /> <br />
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<a got="" href="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-Gn9dtHvXHM0/U6zDCpgM_wI/AAAAAAAABLE/cHE2N1N3pYc/vlcsnap-2014-06-26-20h33m51s80-8x6.png?imgmax=800" it="" now="" rel="thumbnail" title="" ve="" well="" you=""><img border="0" src="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-RuFwN0nF8Hs/U6zDDEqPG6I/AAAAAAAABLM/nmKInH1LLww/vlcsnap-2014-06-26-20h33m51s80%25255B2%25255D.png?imgmax=800" height="239" width="335" /></a></div>
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While evading the sheriff with another long jump (and an automated alert from Auto Trader!) they pass a billboard that indicates that maybe Daisy’s started up a business in her later years:<br /> <br />
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<a href="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-rSsYXe7l14g/U6zDEX6NQpI/AAAAAAAABLU/oY8Hq0n5FUk/vlcsnap-2014-06-26-20h36m39s111-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="Good for her!"><img border="0" src="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-xJc4eOB5Iik/U6zDE04DT7I/AAAAAAAABLc/pu36zgeHqoc/vlcsnap-2014-06-26-20h36m39s111%25255B1%25255D.png?imgmax=800" height="239" width="335" /></a></div>
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Bo says they have to get out of this chase, tells Luke to save his search, and throws the phone at an oncoming Detour sign, causing it to flip the other way! Bo says Luke can pick the search back up on his tablet, and Luke seems impressed. <em>I’m</em> impressed they have Wi-Fi in Hazzard County!<br /> <br />
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<a href="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-aMqX7d8AWWo/U6zDG4QJd5I/AAAAAAAABLk/aPhd-KW74yg/vlcsnap-2014-06-26-20h43m16s3-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="I suppose he can go get it back later, or buy Luke a new phone."><img border="0" src="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-WzWi9O5lNdc/U6zDHvL0WjI/AAAAAAAABLo/yoHiJKK9iUE/vlcsnap-2014-06-26-20h43m16s3%25255B3%25255D.png?imgmax=800" height="254" width="335" /></a></div>
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After the cops take the fake detour, it appears the boys are going to crash into a suspiciously ramp-shaped pile of logs. Instead, they hit the jump and end up crashing through the front window of an Auto-Trader dealership. That must’ve been some jump!<br /> <br />
<div class="wlWriterEditableSmartContent" id="scid:8747F07C-CDE8-481f-B0DF-C6CFD074BF67:39d4f9cc-d3ca-4c16-9d55-2e6bf295e253" style="display: block; float: none; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; width: 335px;">
<a href="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-Ybok8goeYN4/U6zDIn1pXHI/AAAAAAAABL0/Q9MEsEcpiWk/vlcsnap-2014-06-26-20h46m26s7-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="Look at that guy, trying to get out of the way. I'll bet he spilled his coffee everywhere, possibly burning himself horribly. Nice going, Bo and Luke!"><img border="0" src="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-lnVFBzcCLXc/U6zDJT9CVyI/AAAAAAAABL4/adqh6dOOPlU/vlcsnap-2014-06-26-20h46m26s7%25255B7%25255D.png?imgmax=800" height="283" width="335" /></a></div>
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The dealership guy doesn’t seem terribly shocked, they’re even on a first-name-basis with him (his name’s Rusty). Maybe Bo and Luke own the dealership? It worked for Cale Yarborough after he retired! Anyway, Bo asks to see a Dodge Viper, Luke piping up to ask if they can get it in orange.<br /> <br />
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<a href="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-X71C0feSZqA/U6zDKaXOZVI/AAAAAAAABME/tUPzi0p14V0/vlcsnap-2014-06-26-20h51m10s141-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="Yes, Luke. Yes you can."><img border="0" src="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-DS7MP9ZJA7c/U6zDK-0XIiI/AAAAAAAABMI/-rBSqn_Rt4I/vlcsnap-2014-06-26-20h51m10s141%25255B8%25255D.png?imgmax=800" height="239" width="335" /></a></div>
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So they drive off into the sunset, and that’s the end of the commercial. It’s a fun little nostalgia piece, and you can tell both Schneider and Wopat were having fun revisiting roles they hadn’t played in 14 years, give or take an episode of <em>Smallville</em>. Maybe I’ll review that when the time comes.<br />
On a different note, I’m not a fan of the General Lee’d Dodge Viper; it looks a little too sleek or something for my taste. Here’s my take on what a 2013 Dodge Charger, which is what Luke first looked up, might look like:<br /> <br />
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<a href="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-QtoZ6f5hDQw/U6zDLuco3xI/AAAAAAAABMU/y3-ft1G3TaM/general-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="A little better, I think. Plus a more modern looking 01 on the side!"><img border="0" src="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-T7f2u44yJd0/U6zDMWqlkZI/AAAAAAAABMY/6hHN3lYbAq4/general%25255B12%25255D.png?imgmax=800" height="223" width="335" /></a></div>
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As for the General Lee, I can only hope they out him up in proper storage, as is befitting such a beloved vehicle, rather than this, which is actually a model someone built, <a href="http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/1-18-DUKES-OF-HAZZARD-GENERAL-LEE-BARN-FIND-DIORAMA-SCRAP-TV-SHOW-ANDREW-GREEN/390871784891?_trksid=p2047675.c100011.m1850&_trkparms=aid%3D222007%26algo%3DSIC.MBE%26ao%3D1%26asc%3D22703%26meid%3D7902495054560006324%26pid%3D100011%26prg%3D9178%26rk%3D1%26rkt%3D10%26sd%3D310714625456" target="_blank">available for bid on eBay!</a> It’s expensive, but look at all that detail! If I were a rich man, it’d be on its way to my house right now.<br /> <br />
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<a href="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-tqe6MO3FTUA/U6zDNb_skRI/AAAAAAAABMk/QBnACqJZqc4/junked-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="Oh, General. You deserve a better fate."><img border="0" src="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-zi9MxFPNggY/U6zDOPLBE1I/AAAAAAAABMo/ywx0bI9xSyA/junked%25255B2%25255D.png?imgmax=800" height="291" width="335" /></a></div>
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I’ll see you all soon for Season 2, Episode 9, “Witness for the Persecution.”Jay Dukehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15329005721647143286noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139039015033528047.post-10537014331469049962014-06-23T21:40:00.001-04:002014-06-23T21:48:15.755-04:00Season 2, Episode 8, “Hazzard Connection”<em>In which there’s a demolition derby, and my spell check does not care for the name of the villain…</em><br />
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We open at the Boars Nest, where Bo and Cooter are drooling over the new waitress, Bessie Lou, while Luke looks on in disgust, remarking “She walks like a trucker!”<br />
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Afterwards, Rosco is searching a truck and trailer full of junked cars, under suspicion that the driver’s boss, Augie Detweiller, is smuggling something. The Balladeer pipes up and fills us in on who Augie Detweiller is, and that he steals fancy racing engines and then puts them into junked car bodies, so he can then smuggle them out of the county and sell them. Wouldn’t it be easier to just operate somewhere closer to a city, which is certainly full of chop shops and the like?<br />
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<a href="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-vo049W7YlHQ/U6jVNb18e3I/AAAAAAAABFs/kRda2pdex1Y/Auggie_Doggie_300-8x6.gif?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="He must have had a falling out with his dad..."><img border="0" src="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-lrmzS--k1c0/U6jVOOZYNSI/AAAAAAAABF0/eoyElKw4Ygg/Auggie_Doggie_3002.png?imgmax=800" height="375" width="262" /></a></div>
Back at the farm, Bo and Luke are waiting for Cooter to help them repair something, and he’s late, because Cooter is a jerk. Daisy comes outside and tells the boys that Cooter just called from Colonial City, and wants them to come pick up some junked cars for Augie’s demolition derby. They all hop into Daisy’s car and head over. Uh oh!<br />
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At the Boars Nest, Boss asks Rosco for a report on the Detweiller situation, noting that the state police have asked Boss to keep an eye open, and that he can’t abide a crook in his county…that doesn’t give him a cut. Truly, Boss is a paragon of morality. Enos comes in and reports that it seems like Bo and Luke are working for Detweiller. Boss tells Enos to prepare to arrest the Dukes for aiding and abetting, and to keep his eyes glued to Detweiller.<br />
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So Bo and Luke pick up the cars and smash them into each other while arguing about the waitress again. Luke offers up the insult of “She got skinny legs and crooked feet!” Unfortunately, the captions turn it into something altogether different:<br />
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They deliver the cars to Detweiller and watch as a rigged “Slammer” car cruises around the track. Unfortunately, a slammer car has nothing to do with POGS, but rather is a regular demo derby car with six inches of concrete in the doors and trunk, giving the driver an advantage. It’s apparently super illegal. Bo and Luke seems suspicious, but Detweiller assures them the slammer is just for show between races, and he’d <em>never </em>use one in a competition race, stopping just shy of winking when he says it. Bo and Luke seem convinced.<br />
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<a href="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-5mWQCfmVHn8/U6jVQ3aDuMI/AAAAAAAABGM/GgBURwm4kII/slammer-8x6.jpg?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="Bad News, indeed, slammer. Your time has passed. Accept it."><img border="0" src="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-IR6DF1WNcHI/U6jVRp820GI/AAAAAAAABGQ/gnZ-qCoCNew/slammer.png?imgmax=800" height="375" width="335" /></a></div>
Rosco and Enos are there, and witness Detweiller give the Duke some advance money for bringing more cars over to him. Apparently, Detweiller is aware the cops are watching, and has known about it all week, and has been setting up Bo and Luke to take the fall if their plan goes awry.<br />
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So Rosco sends Enos over to stake out the Duke farm, and he’s witness to all sorts of suspicious sights, like Daisy hanging laundry!<br />
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And Jesse plowing the field, which is the first time I’ve seen anyone doing any actual work around the farm!<br />
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So it turns out that Daisy is well aware they’re being watched, and tells Bo and Luke about it, also mentioning that Cooter’s Garage is being watched, too, only she says”Grr-age.” <br />
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Luke comes up with a plan to get Enos to tell them what’s going on, by disconnecting something in Enos’ car, forcing him to get a ride with Bo and Luke in a junker car they’re delivering to Detweiller. He has no choice, so he goes along. Luke brings up the spying, and Enos says it’s police business, but the Dukes don’t give a shit about police business! <br />
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Luke pretends the breaks on the car are out and starts swerving around drunkenly. Enos, not wanting to die without coming clean, tells them what’s going on. Bo and Luke are shocked about Detweiller, and Luke puts the brakes on. Enos is understandably upset that they made him disobey his orders, but really, you’d think he’d know by now that when you’re friends with the Dukes, you’re gonna get fucked over sooner or later.<br />
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After that brilliant bit of skullduggery, the Fates give Luke Duke a big “fuck you!” and the bakes go out, for reals this time! Luckily, no one is killed or injured, except a fence and probably a bunch of fish after they end up in a pond.<br />
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After Luke comes up with the plan to figure out what’s being smuggled, he and Bo head over to the demolition derby track to look for jobs, asking Detweiller if they can drive in the derby and get some “real money.” Detweiller laughs at them, saying that even if they could handle one of his cars, they’d have nothing to lose, so he wants them to drive the General Lee in the derby, then calls them chicken, not thinking they’ll risk the damage. Bo will not stand for this insult, and a very slow demolition derby race begins!<br />
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After several minutes of Bo narrowly avoiding being hot and Luke looking on anxiously, Detweiller agrees to let them race. Rosco, who’s still tailing them, witnesses this and heads off to tell Boss, who’s busy throwing darts at a picture of Bo and Luke.<br />
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<a as="" good="" handy.="" href="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-XV0h7Kf6h_w/U6jVg-4KPtI/AAAAAAAABIM/qwYiNWq0nj0/vlcsnap-2014-06-23-20h30m03s68-8x6.png?imgmax=800" is="" mine="" rel="thumbnail" the="" title="Apparently there wasn't a map he could stab a knife into while saying " world=""><img border="0" src="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-RYm3V6vp3MM/U6jVh5TGKMI/AAAAAAAABIU/86GcqvX9ed4/vlcsnap-2014-06-23-20h30m03s68%25255B5%25255D.png?imgmax=800" height="320" width="335" /></a></div>
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Detweiller send them over with a truckload of cars over to Choctaw County, with Rosco hot on their trail. The boys see this and realize that they might be smuggling something <em>right now, </em>and if Rosco catches them with it, it’ll be curtains for them!<br />
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Enos gets a warrant and drives to meet Rosco on his way to where the boys are headed. Meanwhile, Daisy, apparently having been told of this eventuality by Luke (it’s weird, he tries to raise her on the CB, but she never answers, yet she’s right where she needs to be), pulls her car in front of Rosco’s cruiser, causing it to smash into Daisy’s Plymouth, HARD.<br />
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So after they pass Rosco and Daisy, Luke notices they’re being followed, and Bo tries to lose them down a dirt road. The pursuers are undeterred, and are eventually revealed to be Detweiller and his goon, claiming they were testing the boys’ ability to work under pressure. He says they passed his test, and to report the next day for some “real work”. Isn’t that what they were doing already, minus the being followed? Ugh.<br />
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Having waited the entire night in the town square, the boys and Cooter finally see Detweiller drive off, and follow him to the local abandoned stone quarry, which is where he is operating out of. They sneak into the operation via a convenient cave, and rifle through an office, only to realize that, ascot or no, Detweiller isn’t stupid enough to hide anything there when he knows Rosco has been following him. In their haste to avoid being seen, they see that Detweiller is smuggling stolen racing engines, which we knew about many many paragraphs ago. They are eventually caught, and Bo retaliates by swinging and missing at the guy, while the guy very nicely reacts and falls down anyway.<br />
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After an exciting escape, they head off to tell the state police what’s going on, taking the evidence with them on the trailer. There’s a big end-of-episode chase where everybody gets involved, even Daisy and Jesse, who are much closer to the county line at the farm than I would have guessed. Luke runs the smugglers off the road, causing their car to flip completely upside down, but they’re fine, because there’s two minutes left, and they need to be arrested.<br />
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Luke takes the evidence to the state police as they were originally planning, and Detweiller and Co. get sent to prison. Everything goes back to normal, and Bo and Luke celebrate their hard work by wining and dining the new barmaid and her sister, who Luke can’t seem to find fault with.<br />
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As for the Hazzard Connection, well, someday we’ll find it…<br />
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Jay Dukehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15329005721647143286noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139039015033528047.post-19746104052525610672014-06-10T23:47:00.000-04:002014-06-10T23:54:15.197-04:00Season 2, Episode 7, “Dukes Meet Cale Yarborough”<em>In which the Dukes meet Cale Yarborough…</em><br />
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We begin this tale with Rosco chasing Bo and Luke (and Luke is driving! That’s pretty rare, you guys!) over some unknown infraction, while Bo wonders why, as they haven’t done anything wrong today. Geez, Bo, maybe he’s chasing you for any of the other times you broke the law in previous episodes that you haven’t paid for?<br />
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The boys accidentally break their probation by crossing the state line, because Rosco had previously removed the conveniently labeled sign indicating they were about to do so. <br />
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Firstly, Conyers, Georgia (main filming location <a href="http://dukesofhazzardreviewed.blogspot.com/2013/06/season-one-episode-one-one-armed.html" target="_blank">of</a> <a href="http://dukesofhazzardreviewed.blogspot.com/2013/06/season-one-episode-two-daisys-song.html" target="_blank">the</a> <a href="http://dukesofhazzardreviewed.blogspot.com/2013/06/season-one-episode-three-mary-kayes.html" target="_blank">first</a> <a href="http://dukesofhazzardreviewed.blogspot.com/2013/06/season-1-episode-4-repo-men-originally.html" target="_blank">five</a> <a href="http://dukesofhazzardreviewed.blogspot.com/2013/07/season-1-episode-5-high-octane.html" target="_blank">episodes</a>, and where I place Hazzard County when I do these insane bits of research) is some 75 miles from the closest state border, which is Alabama. Secondly, knowing that, Rosco is <em>well </em>outside his jurisdiction, having to go through at least four counties to get to said border. And finally, if crossing the state border violates their probation, don’t you think the Dukes would make damn sure they know where the state line is, regardless of if there’s a sign there or not?<br />
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Annnnyway, Rosco gets super excited and calls Boss, expecting high praise for his good deed. Boss yells at him for interrupting his meditation; he’s even got a shrine! Granted, it’s just two candles and a stack of money on the table, but is that really any less silly than the Church of Ed Wood? (Yes, that’s a real thing, <a href="http://www.edwood.org/" target="_blank">it’s right here in this link</a>.)<br />
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So Boss tells Rosco to arrest Bo and Luke for breaking their probation, which they conveniently overhear via C.B. radio. Wouldn’t you think the police would have a separate channel, maybe a secure one that random criminals couldn’t just listen in on?<br />
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In making their getaway, Bo and Luke come across an unfamiliar road, as where else do they have to be, besides evading capture? Surely there’s time for a leisurely drive! The road leads to a racetrack, where a non-General Lee’d Dodge Charger is racing around. They get out of the car to take a closer look, and the pit boss, Chet Garvey (that sounds correct, right? Pit…master? Pitfall? Pit, the commodities trading game? I don’t know, racing is naught but driving in a circle to me) tells them they’re trespassing. The driver of the other car gets out and confirms this, and also that he’s Cale Yarborough, owner of Cale Yarborough Honda in Florence, SC!<br />
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Turns out he’s at this secret race track to test out an experimental engine, and eventually use it to win something called the Illinois 500, which I’m pretty sure isn’t a thing, unless he meant the Indianapolis 500, and he’s not even driving one of those cars. Regardless, they’re testing in secret because they don’t want the Jethro Brothers a duo so dastardly their reputation precedes them, in that Bo and Luke already know who they are, so the audience gets no exposition.<br />
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After the boys drive the other Charger around for a while, Cale mentions that there’s a problem with the engine and wants to know where to go to get a part. Bo tells him “Old Cooter will mill you one up custom.” Cale says “What’s an old cooter?” which made me choke on my drink. This isn’t helped by the fact that the very next shot is of Daisy.<br />
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At the Boars Nest, Jesse and is playing chess with old Cooter himself, and who I can only assume are the Jethro Brothers (because the episode’s certainly not going to tell me!) come in snooping for Cale Yarborough. Just then the boys and Garvey the pit boss (confirmed by Bo!) come in and quietly tell Jesse and Cooter what’s going on, then Cooter just blurts out “CALE YARBOROUGH?!” like a jerk.<br />
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Enos rushes in to try and arrest Bo and Luke for the accidental state-line-crossing. A car chase commences, and Rosco eventually catches and arrests them. The Jethros are outside the station asking about Cale again, but Rosco quickly turns them away. Bo and Luke try and get Enos to let them make a phone call, but he’s distrustful after <a href="http://dukesofhazzardreviewed.blogspot.com/2013/07/season-1-episode-8-big-heist-originally.html" target="_blank">the time they tied him up and left him to sit in his own waste</a>.<br />
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They eventually convince him, and call Cooter of all people, but it’s really to let Garvey know about the Jethros. He heads over to bail them out of jail, much to Rosco’s dismay. They are seen heading back over to the garage with Garvey, and take the opportunity to bug both the General Lee and the<br />
white Charger.<br />
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Back at his office, Boss gets a telephone call from his cousin Maybelle, who works at the telephone company, calling to read him a telegram from the Jethro Bros, letting whoever it was intended for know they’re going to steal Cale Yarborough’s fancy engine. Boss’ wheels start turning as to how he can turn this into a profit for himself, because he’s not rich enough as it is. Rosco arrests them and brings them in to see Boss, who agrees to drop all the charges against them in return for $15,000 of the prize money. This is all overheard by Daisy, who was bringing in some champagne Boss had ordered. <br />
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With the new part Cooter milled for the engine in place, the white Charger runs great! There is much rejoicing, but it’s interrupted by Daisy on the C.B., who fills them in on the situation. This is further interrupted by Jesse on an additional C.B, and he seems <strong><em>pissed</em></strong>. They hightail it back to the farm to see what the hell he’s so upset about.<br />
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Turns out he’s pretty cross with them about breaking their probation by crossing the state line. They try to explain about the engine and the Jethros and Cale Yarborough, but he’s unmoved. They counter by saying he didn’t raise them that way; he raised them to help people who needed it against the corrupt system. Realizing they’re right, he lets them go.<br />
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Enos pulls up and begins to arrest the boys. They point out that they’re out on bail, but Enos says Boss made up the warrant and he’s got to do his job. Jesse starts asking Enos a bunch of questions about whether or not he thinks Bo and Luke are guilty, and if he should really arrest them even though he knows they didn’t do anything, spinning things around on Enos so bad that he lets them go. Enos realizes this and gets all butthurt that Jesse tricked him. Jesse says he thinks Enos <em>wanted </em>to be tricked, and that deep down, he wants to fight the law as much as the Dukes do. Enos says he’s probably right, which is a pretty interesting wrinkle in Enos’ character. He heads off to give chase to the boys anyway.<br />
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Back at the track, Garvey and Cale want to leave, but Luke points out that it won’t be easy with Boss blocking the roads. He then details a brilliant plan to confuse the crap out of everyone, allowing Cake and Garvey to get to Illinois. The plan goes as such:<br />
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It goes…poorly, what with the cars being bugged. The boys’ every move is being anticipated, and they don’t understand why. They eventually lose the cops and decide to get Cale out of town via the plane of Amos Stigger, the local crop duster.<br />
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Amos tells them he can’t do it today, he’s got to do a last minute job dusting Boss’ crops, which don’t exist. Jeez, what a creep. He’ll take your money, even though he’s not providing the service. The cops pull up and another chase ensues! After a spectacular jump, they pull off somewhere and find the bug in the General Lee. They get their revenge by holding the bug up to the car’s horns under the hood and blowing it. This is so loud, even over the radio, that Boss falls to the floor in shock. Bo and Luke laugh long and heartily.<br />
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They go over to Cooter’s and come up with an even better plan! They proceed to paint up Cale’s white Charger and an additional Charger they happened to find like the General Lee, with Daisy volunteering to paint the Confederate Flag on the cars, piping up “I’ll paint the flag! I just love that flag!”<br />
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The police have three roads blocked off in an attempt to catch the Dukes when they try to skip town. Good thing there are three General Lees, with Jesse driving General A, Daisy General B and the boys in General C, the original.<br />
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There is much confusion as to who is where, and the chasing is even more insane than usual. The boys jump right over Boss, as Cale put the turbocharger, which turns out not to be an entire engine, just a piece, onto the General Lee. Cale Yarborough makes it safely out of Hazzard and goes on to win the Illinois 500. Yay?<br />
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Jay Dukehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15329005721647143286noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139039015033528047.post-77182548223496858562014-06-01T17:27:00.000-04:002014-06-01T17:30:11.082-04:00Season 2, Episode 6, “The Ghost of General Lee”<em>In which the reports of death are greatly exaggerated…</em><br />
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We open, like most times, with Rosco chasing Bo and Luke. Bo remarks that they didn’t even do anything, they’re just testing out the General Lee’s new camshaft. Rosco radios Enos the Dukes’ location, and his reply is garbled, due to what seems to be a faulty radio. <br />
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Luke bets Bo that he can fool Rosco into losing them using his Enos impression over the radio. He does, and we are treated to a shot of Tom Wopat lip synching over an audio track of Enos-type phrases. As a result of this, they lose the police.<br />
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Meanwhile, over in Sweetwater County, Chief Lacey (who used to be chief of police in Springville County <a href="http://dukesofhazzardreviewed.blogspot.com/2013/08/season-1-episode-10-deputy-dukes.html" target="_blank">back in season 1</a>; I guess maybe he took a different job? Or, more likely, the continuity is non-existent) drops a couple of con men off at the Hazzard line, methodically naming off, and then destroying, their tools for fixing games of chance. He then tells them that if they ever come back, they’ll be going away for 10 years, then mutters “let that dummy in Hazzard handle them.” Jerk.<br />
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The hustlers resolve to steal a car so they can get to a place called Cottondale, where they come upon Bo and Luke skinny dipping for no reason, because apparently this is a thing male cousins do in rural areas?<br />
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The hustlers steal the General Lee, and head toward Cottondale, meeting up with Rosco on the road. He gives chase, thinking it’s Bo and Luke. They end up going off the road and into a pond. They do not come back up.<br />
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This is where things take a serious turn. Enos dives down and can’t get to the bodies, so they think Bo and Luke are dead. In a sterling bit of acting on the part of James Best, Rosco frantically calls for an ambulance and wrecker to the site, saying “The Duke boys done gone in the pond, while looking just devastated. The hustlers look on from the weeds, having escaped the car before it sunk.<br />
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Rosco heads back and tells Boss what happened. Boss is pretty upset, too, saying he’s going to miss them as nemeses, and that life is going to be all the drearier without them to deal with. He then pulls out the watch that he carries, referring to it as the watch owned by Confederate President Jefferson Davis. He then asks Rosco how much he thinks it’s worth, then promptly smashes it!<br />
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He then tells Rosco that it’s only worth $15, and the real watch (worth $20,000) is locked up in his safe; he’s been fooling everyone for years! He then proposes a plan in which he claims the watch was stolen by Bo and Luke before they died, while having the real one all along, thus netting him an extra $20K, and making him a contender for Asshole of the Year.<br />
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Meanwhile, Bo and Luke, super-panicked and super-naked, come upon some girl they know and ask her for some of her dad’s clothes, so they can hide their shame. They are come upon by the girl’s disapproving mother, who tells them she doesn’t want any of their nonsense, and to get the hell out. They leave, and Luke remarks that “A man ain’t truly been insulted til he’ stood buck-naked in front of a woman and she didn’t even notice!” “Or care!” smirks Bo.<br />
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At the Boars Nest, Cooter is playing pool against the hustlers, while Uncle Jesse and Daisy are drinking and waitressing, respectively. Boss and Rosco walk in, and Boss makes Rosco tell Jesse what happened to the boys. The whole rest of the scene is played totally straight, and it works beautifully. Jesse can’t believe what he’s heard, Cooter very quietly puts his head into his hands, and Daisy looks like she’s about to bawl.<br />
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Jesse sits down in a chair, and Rosco tells him that even though he chased Bo and Luke when they’d speed and whatnot, they seemed to enjoy the chase, and he did too. He then says it wasn’t ever personal. Jesse responds by silently giving Rosco’s hand a squeeze, as if to say “I don’t blame you.”<br />
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Everyone gathers around them to comfort each other, when Boss pops up and tells Jesse the bullshit story about the stolen watch, and you just want to kick him in the throat for even daring to pull such a thing. Even Rosco looks uncomfortable with his participation in the scheme, and Jesse gravely says that he’s going to prove the boys didn’t steal the watch if it takes until he dies.<br />
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Meanwhile, Bo and Luke, having stolen the clothes off a scarecrow, eventually make it back to the Duke farm, where the fastest wake ever is going on. Really, it can’t have been more than a couple of hours since the General Lee went into the pond, unless it’s been a day or something. Since it never gets dark in Hazzard anymore (a mandate from producer Paul Picard), we can never know for sure. Jesse goes over to the window and sees the boys peeking in. He rushes outside and is very happy to see them, which turns on a dime to being rather pissed off, and he corrals them into the barn.<br />
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One they get there, Jesse fills them in on the whole watch fiasco, and they have no idea what he’s talking about, because of course they didn’t do it. They tell him about what happened with the hustlers stealing the General Lee, and then Daisy shows up and screams, as her cousins are alive. Cooter comes running outside and is more shocked than anyone that they are alive.<br />
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Rosco pulls up to the house, come to pay his respects, and Bo and Luke (and Cooter!) make a plan to head into town to clear the boys’ names.<br />
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Later, at the police station, Rosco is waiting for his lunch, and hears Luke’s voice coming from a CB radio, saying he’s calling from beyond the grave. Rosco is freaked out, but is pretty sure this is all a hoax. The voice then tells him to go down to the impound garage to find proof that he’s telling the truth. He warily heads down there, only to find:<br />
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Luke continues to play up the haunting while Rosco slowly backs out of the garage, where he literally runs into Enos, who’s bringing back Rosco’s lunch. He shows Enos the car, and they’re scared shitless by the hood and trunk opening and closing, while Luke spookily says “ROSCO!”<br />
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The car then drives away, seemingly without a driver. In reality, Bo and Luke are driving, while ducked down, and using a periscope to see with; they’re doing a pretty good job, all things considered. Rosco and Enos give chase, causing all sorts of damage. After the driverless General Lee nearly makes a train hit Boss Hogg’s car, he and Rosco start to figure out that something’s fishy, and determine that it’s probably Cooter’s doing. Daisy pulls up to the Boars Nest and walks into Boss’ office, only to find the hustlers cracking the safe to steal the watch, which they heard about in the bar earlier. They swiftly kidnap her and tie her to a chair.<br />
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While she struggles to get free, the hustlers are trying to crack the safe by putting their ear to the door and trying to hear the tumblers. This is so ridiculous, even the Balladeer comments on it: “You reckon anybody can really open a safe that way?” They leave to go steal a pickup truck, so they can transport the safe and blow it open once they get some dynamite.<br />
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<a anything="" can="" hear="" href="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-5qMYH6XD4R8/U4uaM9CR1bI/AAAAAAAAA-o/wec5Ps0XmjY/vlcsnap-2014-06-01-16h55m18s144-8x6.png?imgmax=800" i="" in="" it="" movies="" rel="thumbnail" t="" the="" title="" ut="" workes=""><img border="0" src="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-huf_wGc8INc/U4uaNvlFwbI/AAAAAAAAA-s/VysIn2Xwbg8/vlcsnap-2014-06-01-16h55m18s144%25255B4%25255D.png?imgmax=800" height="306" width="335" /></a></div>
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Boss overhears Jesse communicating with the boys, and it’s revealed that they’re still alive! He tells Rosco to catch them before they get to the Boars Nest and clear their names. While the hustlers are loading the safe into the truck outside, Daisy pulls a pretty impressive feat to call for help, by spinning her chair around, knocking the phone off the cradle, and dialing the operator with the heel of her shoe, who connects her to the police station. She fills Enos in, and he heads over.<br />
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Bo and Luke arrive, freeing Daisy, and there’s a huge chase, eventually leading into Sweetwater County, where they are all met by Chief Lacey. <br />
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They all start arguing over the safe, and Chief Lacey threatens to arrest all of them, and Rosco pipes up:<br />
<blockquote>
ROSCO: You can’t arrest me, I’m a sheriff, too!<br />
LACEY: I can in Sweetwater County, and that’s where you are <em>now</em>, boy!</blockquote>
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<a href="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-UbPBdL4gJSE/U4uaRoBbADI/AAAAAAAAA_Y/yF0ATDgPj-0/vlcsnap-2014-06-01-17h12m19s11-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="I wouldn't point at him, he's liable to bite that finger off."><img border="0" src="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-sitOs0JlTJo/U4uaSS_7TfI/AAAAAAAAA_g/kRpeIhk77k8/vlcsnap-2014-06-01-17h12m19s11%25255B2%25255D.png?imgmax=800" height="306" width="335" /></a></div>
Lacey makes Boss open the safe, and the watch is in there! He yells at Rosco, making it seem like Rosco told him it was stolen. The hustlers get arrested, Bo and Luke are cleared, and Boss has to pay back the money he collected from the insurance company. Bo says that if he hadn’t left the keys in the General Lee, none of this would have happened! Luke looks like he wants to smack Bo. <br />
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Oh, and Jesse makes Boss pay the boys the $500 he’d offered as a reward for finding the watch, because there’s nothing better than kicking someone when they’re down. Jay Dukehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15329005721647143286noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139039015033528047.post-88118773827682547712014-05-24T20:00:00.000-04:002014-05-31T14:23:55.679-04:00And We're Back! (Season 2, Episode 5, "Road Pirates")Welcome back, any readers that held out hope of my return!<br />This was the least engaging episode so far. To make it fun for myself, I decided to make a fumetti review, which is an Italian term that means "story told with photographs", more of which can be read about <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fumetti#Fumetti">here.</a><br />So, here we are, season 2, episode 5, "Road Pirates." <br />
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Jay Dukehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15329005721647143286noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139039015033528047.post-85818988023435915032014-05-19T21:01:00.001-04:002014-05-19T21:01:47.493-04:00Coming Soon!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span id="goog_1537621860"></span><span id="goog_1537621861"></span>Oh, that's right, it's happening.Jay Dukehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15329005721647143286noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139039015033528047.post-80522804514926066662013-10-31T22:20:00.000-04:002013-10-31T22:20:24.701-04:00Happy HalloweenFrom all of us here at DoH reviewed (all of us? This is a one man operation, and I'm not even very good at it...), have a safe and happy Halloween, All Hallow's Eve, or Hallowe'en! Updates resume Saturday, November 2!<br />
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And yes, they are technically Star Wars Jedi Ghosts, but those are the only kinds of ghosts I can make.Jay Dukehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15329005721647143286noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139039015033528047.post-52992733670882283172013-10-29T07:40:00.001-04:002013-10-29T07:40:54.402-04:00Hey guys. I've been dealing with some pretty bad depression as of late, not to mention my hard drive dying on me. I apologize for the lack of updates, and I fully intend to get back on the horse ASAP. Thank you for your patience.Jay Dukehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15329005721647143286noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139039015033528047.post-36355391616239236572013-10-13T22:47:00.002-04:002013-10-13T22:47:16.360-04:00Season 2, Episode 4: “The Meeting” – Originally Aired 10-12-1979<i>In which Boss gets an offer he can’t refuse, but I really wish he would have…</i><br />
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Okay, here we go. Bo and Luke are driving along, only to be stopped by a crapload of sheep in the road. Bo mutters something about having never seen such hairy pigs, which is probably supposed to be funny, but it just makes him seem ignorant. Come on, Bo, you grew up and continue to live on a farm, surely you know the difference.<br /> <br />
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Meanwhile, Rosco lays in wait to catch them speeding with his new super fancy radar gun. He clocks them at 1/2 mile over the limit, and decides to try and ticket them, because he’s an asshole.<br /> <br />
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At the Boars Nest, Boss takes a meeting with an old acquaintance, Black Jack Bender, whom he knows from back in his moonshiner days. This guy keeps calling Boss “Curly,” and I can’t decide if it’s a play on the fact that he’s bald, or a Three Stooges reference.<br /> <br />
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So the chase ends with Rosco’s car almost completely submerged in the water, and he’s soaked through.with no Jedi kid or weird-speaking Muppet to help get him out, either. <br />
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Boss and Bender are eating lunch, and Bender is catching Boss up on what he does now, as he apparently got out of the mob scene some time ago. He refers to himself as “the purveyor of recreational paraphernalia to the younger generation,” to which my first thought was “Holy shit, he’s selling bongs and crack pipes!” but then he clarifies that he’s in the toy business. He then tells Boss that he needs a place where he and his associates can meet to discuss his new toy design, fearing industrial spies, and offering $10,000 for Boss’s trouble. Boss says “fuck yes!” and offers up the county jailhouse. <br />
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Bo and Luke continue their driving, and come across Bender and his gang stalled out on the side of the road, or rather, they see this as they pass over mid jump.<br /> <br />
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Bender, impressed with the boys’ driving, offers them $100 to take him to the jail, and Luke stays behind to help fix the car. Back in town, Bo, Luke and Cooter watch as a bunch of limousines pull up to the jail, and a bunch of guys who look suspiciously like gangsters get out. <br /> <br />
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Boss is paying Cooter to store the limos overnight, and, after parking one, decides to root around inside, because why not? He finds a gun, and tells Bo and Luke, who proceed to PUT THEIR HANDS ALL OVER IT. <br /> <br />
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<br />So, not content to let sleeping dogs lie, they search through the other cars and find a whole bunch more guns. For some reason, they get Daisy and Uncle Jesse over there to come have a look, and then they all decide that they should butt in and put a stop to whatever shenanigans are afoot. Why they feel the need to do this is beyond me, and they don’t offer up any real reason to, other than some half-hearted “those guns are illegal and people could get hurt” talk from Jesse. <br />
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Inside the police station, a much less interesting version of a scene from <i>The Godfather </i>takes place, during which the gathered crime bosses bitch about their sons taking control and phasing them out of their respective businesses. Daisy tries to get inside, claiming to be Cletus’s girlfriend, but the guy at the door says he’s out to breakfast, and shoos her away. I bet he didn’t believe her story for a second; like Cletus could ever get with Daisy. <br />
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At the Boars Nest, Bo and Luke start a fight with each other in an attempt to get arrested, and when Rosco tries to break it up, Bo punches Rosco in the face!<br /> <br />
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Rosco is understandably upset, and makes to arrest them, but Boss comes in and tells Rosco to forget about it, and says the jail is being fumigated. He then tells Daisy to send a bunch of meals over to the jail, specifically meals of catfish and champagne, which is the worst combination I’ve heard of since Nuts and Gum.<br /> <br />
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<a href="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-Ea490VRfHAg/Ultaj8qULZI/AAAAAAAAA0w/uYdHvDzkNfw/Nuts-And-Gum-8x6.jpg?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title=""><img border="0" src="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-nlzS2Toey64/Ultakk2-xLI/AAAAAAAAA04/sRjJ0NQFs40/Nuts-And-Gum%25255B4%25255D.png?imgmax=800" height="278" width="335" /></a></div>
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So, Daisy and Cooter deliver the food to the jail, with Bo and Luke hidden under the tablecloths covering the carts. Once inside, they blow their cover by MOVING THE CARTS ALONG WITH THEIR HANDS. Oh my god, you guys, this is ridiculous. <br /> <br />
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After some arguing, Bender gives Bo the kiss of death, and they are shuffled out the door to what they presume to be their demise. Cooter tows their limo away, and craziness ensues, and Bo and Luke get away, climbing up onto the roof of a building and eventually getting to Cooter’s Garage. Inside, they use the phone to try and get ahold of the FBI. They hear an explosion and run over to the phone company, which has been hit by the mob so they can’t contact the feds. <br />
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Meanwhile, the boys have gotten the General back and are being pursued by some of the goons, while Bender keeps track of everything via a map and…I don’t know, matchbox cars pinned to the map? Why wouldn’t they just use regular pins? And where did they get the little General Lee replica?<br /> <br />
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Boss reminds Bender about owing him the other half of the $10,000, saying he doesn’t want them to feel bad for welshing, and they get all upset, rushing forward in unison like an old time comedy bit. Is welshing derived from Welsh people, and is it some sort of stereotype that they don’t pay their debts? I’ve never heard of it if that’s true.<br /> <br />
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The boys meet up with Jesse, Daisy, and Cooter and make a plan, which basically boils down to Daisy causing a distraction by pretending to skinny dip, and the pervs keeping watch will go look instead of doing their job.<br /> <br />
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When they go to peep, Daisy runs back, fully clothed, and Cooter runs down by the pond brandishing a board, which I’m assuming he uses to beat the henchmen to death.<br /> <br />
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After some more antics, all the henchmen are rounded up, and Uncle Jesse moves in to take care of the leaders. Way to have an old man fight your battles that you instigated for no reason, Bo and Luke! Everyone takes off to follow Jesse, who they presume is leading them to the boys. There’s more car chases, including another Duke specialty of chasing everyone around in a circle! <br />
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Eventually, there’s a standoff in the jailhouse, and the mob guys argue over the best way to kill Bo and Luke, and Cletus drops a net on them! Why was there a net hanging in the jailhouse?<br /> <br />
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So, the mob guys all get arrested and the episode is finally over! Jesus Christ, you guys, this was <i>terrible.</i> I don’t know how many more of these sub-standard, even by Dukes of Hazzard measure, I can take. But hey, next week is about stolen TVs, so I should be able to mine some yucks out of that, right?Jay Dukehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15329005721647143286noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139039015033528047.post-6971520944896152332013-10-12T15:06:00.003-04:002013-10-12T15:06:57.158-04:00SPECIAL REPORT!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />Jay Dukehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15329005721647143286noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139039015033528047.post-26826281670544284152013-09-28T22:35:00.001-04:002013-09-28T22:35:37.731-04:00Season 2, Episode 3: “The Rustlers” – Originally Aired 10-03-1979<i>In which there's horse racing, and my interest in the episode is pretty minimal...</i><br />
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The Duke boys, (with Uncle Jesse in tow) are driving along, singing “Amazing Grace” at the top of their lungs. Well, Luke and Jesse are. Bo just looks sort of amused.<br />
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<a href="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-yPPxjzeSvWk/UkeRUOvP2PI/AAAAAAAAAv4/p7SnenKXjoY/vlcsnap-2013-09-28-16h32m05s253-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="That right, Bo, mock them. Mock them in your head."><img border="0" height="306" src="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-0Q_QVPgSqYQ/UkeRUkIdkoI/AAAAAAAAAv8/ScMg_Le0Qd4/vlcsnap-2013-09-28-16h32m05s2539.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
Rosco and Enos are tailing them, as Rosco is convinced the Dukes are transporting a bunch of mash, and are therefore making moonshine. Now, there’s just some bags of stuff in the back of the General Lee, and the internet tells me that mash is a mixture of water, yeast, corn, and sugar. Wouldn’t mash be very difficult to transport in a bag, and much easier in a bucket or something?<br />
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So the Dukes get to a farm, owned by a guy named Tolliver, who has both a hot daughter and a pretty pronounced stutter. Jesse bitches about transporting what turns out to be horse feed in the General Lee, and points out that they have a perfectly good pickup truck. Good for you, Jesse.<br />
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<a href="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-zq_bz23CcRo/UkeRVSqbH_I/AAAAAAAAAwI/rAsc0_FrKns/vlcsnap-2013-09-28-16h50m53s40-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="Look at you, climbing out of the back of a stock car at your age. For shame, Bo and Luke!"><img border="0" height="306" src="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-da9OpY1qwT0/UkeRV8-k40I/AAAAAAAAAwQ/CRQoX1XYhJ0/vlcsnap-2013-09-28-16h50m53s4017.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
Jesse mentions that Tolliver wanted them to see something, something he called “a miracle.” I was really hoping it’d be a Fatima situation, or at least one of those bogus everyday miracles like a sunrise, but no, it’s just some dumb horse. <br />
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<a href="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-cbHIPNzZLnw/UkeRWCgK0oI/AAAAAAAAAwY/2otrLFSZUhU/toast-8x6.jpg?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="I'd have even settled for Devil Toast."><img border="0" height="239" src="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-scH-X8JyyLE/UkeRWlakc2I/AAAAAAAAAwg/dzOhnNxOUxc/toast11.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
Tolliver explains that he’s planning on entering the horse, named Manassas, in the annual horse race sponsored by Boss’ wife Lulu at the fair every year. Everyone else is like “That idea is stupid, and you’re stupid for having it!” To shut them up, Tolliver suggests they race the car against the horse, using the speedometer as a gauge of the horse’s speed. The horse clocks in at 40mph, which is apparently fast. After this, Jesse reluctantly agrees to put up half the entry fee to enter the horse. <br />
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At the Boar’s Nest, Boss is in the phone with Lulu, assuring her their horse will win the race, as he is buying a “sure thing” horse from a Mr. Dunlap that very moment. Rosco bursts in and tells Boss about the Tolliver’s horse. Boss shoos the horse guy out of the office, and as Dunlap leaves, he puts a decorative pig statue on top of the CB radio’s talk button, so he’ll be able to hear their conversation from in his car. <br />
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So, everyone heads up to the Tolliver farm, where Rosco’s sirens spook the horse, which causes him to run off, and Bo has to hop on a different, presumably shittier, horse to save her. He does so, and Dunlap and his crony see how fast Manassas can go, and resolve to steal the horse as soon as possible. Boss, having seen as well, wants to do a real time trial on a real track, and, if everything turns out okay, he’ll forgive Tolliver’s back mortgage pay, and pay for his entry in the race! The Dukes agree to keep the horse at their place overnight until the time trial the next day, which is weird, because even though Boss says the Tolliver place is falling apart, the damn horse has been living there all its life, I doubt one more night would hurt it, really. But anyway, plot moving forward!<br />
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Boss contrives a bait and switch plan in which Cletus, driving erratically, nearly runs into the Dukes while transporting Manassas, and Molotov cocktails his flipped car. Then, while they are checking on him, Rosco switches out Manassas with a different horse.<br /> <br />
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<a call="" href="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-UyYtu9kXhE4/UkeRaZgyYRI/AAAAAAAAAxI/BO1ZtXEJ0wc/vlcsnap-2013-09-28-21h37m50s115-8x6.png?imgmax=800" i="" ll="" manassas="" rel="thumbnail" second="" title="" you=""><img border="0" height="291" src="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-6fsNPOEPyEM/UkeRawp0VYI/AAAAAAAAAxQ/2LHvn1c09QQ/vlcsnap-2013-09-28-21h37m50s115%25255B1%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
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At the time trials, the Tollivers are all “What the fuck? This is not my horse!” Bo and Luke are as shocked as anyone, but Boss has them arrested for rustling. During the arrest, Luke somehow manages to cuff Boss and Enos together, and they get away, just like they always do.<br />
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Back at the farm, everyone (and Cooter!) sits around eating watermelon and discussing the situation. Cooter tells them that Tolliver isn’t too upset with them, as he knows they didn’t steal the horse. They deduce that Boss is probably keeping the horse nearby, and resolve to go look for it, their remaining melon uneaten. Meanwhile, Rosco, who actually DOES know where the horse is being kept, brings it some food and leaves. He was followed there by Dunlap and Co., who steal the horse, <b><i>finally</i></b>. <br />
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Back in town, Enos remarks about the hay that’s in the back of Rosco’s car. He tells Enos about taking hay to where the horse is. Daisy conveniently stops by and chats up Enos, who tells her about where the horse is. She, in turn, tells Bo and Luke, who head that way, only to pass the horse thieves on the road.<br /> <br />
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They stop and alert anyone who will listen via CB about the situation, when Boss and Rosco show up and arrest Bo and Luke again. The Balladeer pipes up and totally burns Texas, saying, “Getting arrested twice on the same day for the same thing, you kind of get the feeling that you’re in Texas.”<br /> <br />
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In jail, Luke makes a deal with Boss, saying that they’ll tell them where the real rustlers are, if they let them out. He agrees, and they leave. Cooter alerts the boys that he just serviced a van that looks a lot like the rustlers’ van, AND it once said Dunlap Horse Ranch on it. Luke tells Cooter to meet them somewhere, and tells the Tollivers that everything’s gonna be all right, probably because there’s only 10 minutes left. <br />
After a tussle with Dunlap, they knock him out and take the horse back, Luke riding it back along a trail, while Bo rigs up a fake horse tail sticking out the back of the trailer and steals it, the rustlers giving chase.<br />
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They eventually realize they’ve been took, and head back to try and catch Luke. Despite their best efforts, they don’t. and Luke rides the horse up just in time to register for the big race. Manassas wins the race, and everything turns out okay, except for Lulu. She came down with the gout from eating pig knuckles, and couldn’t be there. <br /> <br />
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Jay Dukehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15329005721647143286noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139039015033528047.post-89063839183083848072013-09-21T19:58:00.002-04:002014-06-10T21:39:39.635-04:00Season 2, Episode 2: “Gold Fever” – Originally Aired 9-28-1979<i>In which there’s not really any gold at all…</i><br />
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Bo and Luke are high tailing it to catch up with an RV camper, with Uncle Jesse in tow. Jesse’s got a sore tooth, and the RV contains their dentist, who drives it around as his mobile office. This is pretty hard to believe, but apparently, it has happened <a href="http://www.bizjournals.com/sanantonio/stories/2007/07/30/focus2.html?page=all" target="_blank">at least once</a>. <br />
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Anyway, Jesse has a cavity, and the doctor is on his way to an appointment elsewhere, so he gives Jesse a bunch of pain pills and says he’ll check it out when he comes back into town. They drive away, and are nearly run off the road by what everyone is calling a limousine, but I’m not convinced.<br />
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Everyone gets out of their respective vehicles and whips their dicks out over who caused the accident, but then a guy gets out of the car and calms everyone down by offering to pay for all the damage. His is a Rich Texan, and transporting some mysterious cargo through Hazzard. His goons get all like “wait, what about the cargo?!” something that Bo and Luke would have known nothing about if they hadn’t mentioned it first thing like that. And Uncle Jesse? Well, he’s too high on pain pills to even know what’s going on.<br />
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They direct him over to Cooter’s, who tells them that the axle is broken, and they’ll need to stay in town until it’s fixed. The Rich Texan then asks to be shown the bank, where he meets with Boss Hogg, asking to use the bank’s vault for a night, as he needs to store the three million dollars in gold bars he’s brought with him, offering up $25,000 for the trouble. Boss quickly accepts. Before he leaves, the Rich Texan makes Boss sign a promissory note guaranteeing Boss will pay the three million if anything happens to the Rich Texan's money. <br />
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Boss wonders why the Dukes, who he refers to as his “sworn enemies,” would do Boss such a mitzvah by sending the Rich Texan his way. He quickly concludes that the Dukes have set up the whole scheme, and are planning on robbing the bank. He sends Rosco to arrest them until the Texans leave town.<br />
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Rosco heads over to the Duke farm, and yells at them through a megaphone about how they’re under arrest for running the limo off the road. Jesse pipes up and says he saw the whole thing, and the Texans caused the accident. Now Jesse, we all know you were hopped up on goofballs, you probably didn’t even think they were <i>real</i>. <br />
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At the bank, Boss sets up in front of the vault to guard the gold himself until the next morning. The Rich Texan reminds Boss that he offered to take him to lunch, and wants to discuss the possibility of Boss handling all his banking. Boss, smelling potential money, leaves Rosco and Enos to help guard the gold. <br />
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Meanwhile, Bo and Luke are running around town via the rooftops, and decide to literally drop in on Cooter, who tells them that the axle had been sawed just about in half, and the accident caused it to snap, i.e., it was on purpose. They take off and head to the Boars Nest, where Boss is wining and dining the Rich Texan. He’s even dressed Daisy in some sort of French maid outfit!<br />
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Rosco radios over to Boss and tells him the Dukes got away. Boss is understandably pissed, and tells Rosco to get the fuck back to the bank. The Dukes overhear this, and head toward the bank themselves. Boss and the Texan get to the bank to find the guards knocked out, and the gold gone. Bo and Luke arrive just in time to be shot at by the Texan.<br />
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They don’t get shot, and drive away, the police in tow. They get a radio from Uncle Jesse, who tells them to drop in on Cooter, who has some info for them. They do so, again literally, and he telsl them he’s got a list of stolen cars, and the Texan’s car matches one on the list. They look out the door and see the Texan’s goons leaving town, so they follow them to a spot outside of town where they dump the gold.Bo and Luke overhear the goons converse a bunch of exposition to each other about how great their scheme is going, while burying the gold.<br />
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Luke figures out that this is all a fraud game to bilk Boss out of three million dollars, while Bo wonders why they’d leave that much gold just laying around. Luke takes a pocketknife to one of the bars and scrapes it, revealing that the gold is just painted lead. They drive back toward town to tell Boss the situation,. Rosco pulls them over and won’t listen to their protests. and arrests them. <br />
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At the bank, Boss is freaking the fuck out, as he doesn’t have three million dollars, and the Rich Texan thrusts the promissory note at him, saying it’ll hold up in court, so give him the damn money. Boss asks if $100,000 will do, and the Rich Texan agrees, calling it a down payment. <br />
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Outside, everyone meets up, and Rosco hands over the gold bars, causing the Texan and Co. to shoot out the cop car’s tires and run off with the money. Jesse and Daisy pull up and everyone gives chase to the the swindlers. <br />
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The swindlers shoot out Daisy’s car tires, and just then, the dentist drives by in his RV. They commandeer it, and use his sterilizing alcohol to fashion Molotov cocktails, eventually hitting the swindlers’ car with it. <br />
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So the Rich Texan and friends get arrested, and Boss is so grateful, he offers to pay all of Jesse’s dental bills. They take him up on it, and get a bunch of non-cavity related work done, including some gold inlays.<br />
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Jay Dukehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15329005721647143286noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139039015033528047.post-34976836518103464772013-09-15T20:36:00.001-04:002013-09-15T20:36:18.713-04:00Season 2, Episode 1: “Days of Shine and Roses” – Originally Aired 9-21-1979<i>In which Uncle Jesse races Boss Hogg to determine the best ridge runner of them all…</i><br />
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Welcome back for Season 2, those of you that are returning, and hello to any new readers!<br />
After a new shot of the Balladeer’s guitar (it’s now Waylon Jenning’s signature Telecaster instead of an acoustic), we see that both Cooter and Enos have been added as full time cast members, with their names in the theme song and everything! So, now we’re guaranteed more of Cooter’s “helping” and Enos’s “ogling Daisy.” Yay?<br /> <br />
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The Boars Nest is closed for a private function this evening, for the Annual Ridgerunner’s Reunion. where all the retired moonshiners and friends get together to drink, eat, and reminisce about when they used to break the law for fun and profit. They’re watching a filmstrip of young Jesse and Boss racing to outrun the Sheriff of Hatchapee County, Emmitt “Spike” Loomis, so called because he liked to take a railroad spike and use it to tear apart the cars of moonshiners.<br /> <br />
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After the film, Bo loudly boasts that Uncle Jesse is “the best moonshine runner in the world.” Boss and Rosco disagree, saying Boss was better. Bo makes the spurious claim again, saying “everyone knows it’s true.” Luke tells him to shut the fuck up, but then Boss and Jesse get into it, and decide to have one last run to determine who is <b>really </b>the best, once and for all. <br /> <br />
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We then meet Sheriff Loomis, who is apparently still Sheriff-ing, despite being in the filmstrip from what appears to be the 40s; that’d make this guy at least in his 70s. Maybe things are different in rural Southern areas? Anyway, he’s apparently still spiking things up <br />
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Boss and Jesse and the boys meet up at Cooter’s garage to discuss the terms of the race. THe route is agreed upon, as well as the cargo, the standard 10 gallons of moonshine. Jesse protests and mentions the boys’ probation, so they change it to water instead. JEsse laments that he doesn’t have his car, the original Black Tillie, so Cooter offers him a beat up Mustang that has a super fine engine. He takes it, calling it Black Tillie II.<br /> <br />
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<a high="" href="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-cf2PINyTAqo/UjZSDu9nO0I/AAAAAAAAArY/6uM8qySoaIo/vlcsnap-2013-09-15-19h16m43s237-8x6.png?imgmax=800" octane="" rel="thumbnail" title="Why doesn't he use Sweet Tillie, his shine runner from "><img border="0" height="306" src="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-XyCIRahfJeY/UjZSELvpmXI/AAAAAAAAArg/nR_iTxCxtGE/vlcsnap-2013-09-15-19h16m43s237%25255B5%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
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Boss decides to cheat in the race, and has Rosco sneak over and pour something into the gas tank of Black Tillie II. The next day, Jesse is practicing his moves, when the car stalls out. Luke makes Cooter promise to fix it.He does so, and shows off by tearing through the Boar’s Nest parking lot. Boss sees this and decides to replace the jugs of water in Jesse’s car with real moonshine, and then he calls over to Hatchapee County (using a ridiculous falsetto) and tells Loomis that Jesse will be making a moonshine run through his county on the day of the race, winning him the race, and getting the Dukes out of his hair forever. Loomis is PISSED.<br /> <br />
<div class="wlWriterEditableSmartContent" id="scid:8747F07C-CDE8-481f-B0DF-C6CFD074BF67:f655e716-da93-44fb-be66-b2ec09fc55b8" style="display: block; float: none; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; width: 335px;">
<a href="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-RNc-VPBMCo4/UjZSFEtleWI/AAAAAAAAAro/A8F7tAM1kbo/vlcsnap-2013-09-15-19h36m54s153-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="ROBOT HOUSE!!"><img border="0" height="291" src="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-e8601IDuj_E/UjZSFuT_WVI/AAAAAAAAArs/JuBu0BH8qAE/vlcsnap-2013-09-15-19h36m54s153%25255B4%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
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Daisy overhears Boss and Rosco discussing their other plan, to have Rosco run interference incognito against Jesse during the race. You would think by now they’d know not to discuss their plans at the Boars Nest, where Daisy works. They weren’t even being quiet about it, either. So, obviously, she goes home and tells the boys, who agree to interfere with the interference. <br />
<br />
The next day, while everyone is inside having a pre-race drink, Rosco and some thugs switch out the jugs for moonshine, and then the race begins. Rosco calls Loomis to let him know the race has started, and Bo and Luke trail the race to stop Rosco’s plan. Back at the bar, Cooter hears the thugs gloating about the plan. Jesus, what’s with people on this show just blurting out their evil schemes? Anyway, he tells Daisy and they go out back to check if they really were switched with water.<br /> <br />
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<a href="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-cZ2kwrk4e5w/UjZSGqfRaQI/AAAAAAAAAr4/5OuXcLSdOF4/vlcsnap-2013-09-15-19h55m17s148-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="Yup. And Cooter doesn't like the taste of it."><img border="0" height="291" src="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-WE8M9b3bLPQ/UjZSHKNNubI/AAAAAAAAAr8/mJfXeK_ebAw/vlcsnap-2013-09-15-19h55m17s148%25255B2%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
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Rosco puts up a detour sign, and Jesse follows it, sending him off course. The boys grab the sign and race ahead of Jesse, jumping the car for no reason in the process, nearly tipping it upon landing. Luke gets out and places the sign so Jesse will get back on track. <br />
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<a href="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-BDeiGuvUmWU/UjZSH6-_luI/AAAAAAAAAsI/jte0_t1HhUs/vlcsnap-2013-09-15-20h00m30s200-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="The shot cuts away immediately, and when it cuts back, the car is right side up. MAGIC!"><img border="0" height="306" src="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-LO9fQZABwjw/UjZSIibLvkI/AAAAAAAAAsM/zHhat5uM3Wk/vlcsnap-2013-09-15-20h00m30s200%25255B10%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
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Bo and Luke get a CB notice from Cooter and Daisy about the moonshine in Jesse’s trunk, and JEsse and Boss overhear, because it’s a CB radio. Luke catches up to Jesse and dives onto Black Tillie II, grabbing the moonshine and smashing it on the road. Cooter pulls up beside and hands the water over, so Jesse is clear. <br /> <br />
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<a href="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-62rb7ZvHBv4/UjZSJk9DiFI/AAAAAAAAAsY/3_8DYyFI97U/vlcsnap-2013-09-15-20h09m31s245-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="If he had fallen, I probably would have laughed."><img border="0" height="291" src="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-5DcIO0Uy4CU/UjZSKK-YnlI/AAAAAAAAAsg/aLjZMjpAxqs/vlcsnap-2013-09-15-20h09m31s245%25255B2%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
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Jesse and Boss both make it to Loomis’ roadblock, but then just smash through it and keep going. Jeez, this guy was like the Darth Maul of Dukes villains. He certainly <i>seemed </i>badass, but in the end didn’t do much of anything. Loomis didn’t get cut in half, though.<br /> <br />
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<a at="" have="" href="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-28cSTy4cCbQ/UjZSK5a1qJI/AAAAAAAAAso/Qht88PbveDc/maul-8x6.png?imgmax=800" jedi.="" last="" ourselves="" rel="thumbnail" reveal="" revenge.="" the="" title="" to="" we="" will=""><img border="0" height="306" src="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-QSsWCZeqgp8/UjZSLgwQ-NI/AAAAAAAAAss/Qc037a1twVw/maul%25255B2%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
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So Jesse wins the race, and everyone celebrates. Way to make your season premiere super light on story there, writers.Jay Dukehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15329005721647143286noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139039015033528047.post-90944047794691217622013-09-14T08:59:00.001-04:002013-09-14T08:59:11.495-04:00Apologies<p>Due to poorer than usual time management this past week, coupled with the fact that I’m out of town celebrating my wife’s birthday, today’s post will be delayed until late tonight or early tomorrow. My sincere apologies for the delay.<br> <div style="padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; width: 335px; padding-right: 0px; display: block; float: none; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; padding-top: 0px" id="scid:8747F07C-CDE8-481f-B0DF-C6CFD074BF67:b6a30e75-6c50-43f1-914e-99c9848843e3" class="wlWriterEditableSmartContent"><a href="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-x4qR-8O3yzw/UjRdmx1wvqI/AAAAAAAAAqA/uKT8PzRUzXE/boss-8x6.png?imgmax=800" title="CURSE YOU, JAY DUKE!" rel="thumbnail"><img border="0" src="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-CQHVBAZTJK4/UjRdnjgHdqI/AAAAAAAAAqE/RAnQOQk391w/boss%25255B2%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" height="291" /></a></div></p> Jay Dukehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15329005721647143286noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139039015033528047.post-3072600599089829292013-09-07T22:12:00.003-04:002013-09-08T00:05:49.171-04:00“Boss O’Hogg and the Little People”For my between season special surprise, I’ve decided to review a random episode of “The Dukes,” Warner Bros’ attempt to turn the popular series into a Saturday morning hit. The intro lets Uncle Jesse tell the plot: The boys and Daisy are competing with Boss Hogg and Rosco in a race around the world in the General Lee and Boss Hogg’s Cadillac, both of which can fly and do other crazy cartoon things. The winner gets some prize money <i>and </i>the deed to the Duke farm, which must be the most desirable plot of land ever, because Boss wants it bad.<br> <div id="scid:8747F07C-CDE8-481f-B0DF-C6CFD074BF67:25fe2c3d-f559-4b02-8985-ab19cd973e92" class="wlWriterEditableSmartContent" style="float: none; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-left: 0px; margin-left: auto; display: block; padding-right: 0px; width: 335px; margin-right: auto"><a href="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-xpxsBN1qi4U/UivbWvGHYNI/AAAAAAAAAmI/Ug6OMxhM4jw/vlcsnap-2013-09-07-16h59m43s138-8x6.png?imgmax=800" title="" rel="thumbnail"><img border="0" src="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-AYLhWzV5Uyg/Uiv3mpcNMSI/AAAAAAAAApw/3knQcFfX5hc/vlcsnap-2013-09-07-16h59m43s138.png?imgmax=800" width="335" height="266" /></a></div>For today’s selection, I’ll be taking a look at the second season premiere, “Boss O’Hogg and the Little People, from September 17, 1983..<br><br> <div id="scid:8747F07C-CDE8-481f-B0DF-C6CFD074BF67:e47d7b87-1319-4644-a358-2ac9425f85f6" class="wlWriterEditableSmartContent" style="float: none; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-left: 0px; margin-left: auto; display: block; padding-right: 0px; width: 335px; margin-right: auto"><a href="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-AG8V2djXc3M/UivbctfDABI/AAAAAAAAAmY/I4ee4OsE89Q/vlcsnap-2013-09-07-17h00m02s158-8x6.png?imgmax=800" title="If this doesn't scream early 1980s, then nothing does. NOTHING!" rel="thumbnail"><img border="0" src="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-ZC_PkF7hg8E/UivbfanpJKI/AAAAAAAAAmg/46qnhe1JUPc/vlcsnap-2013-09-07-17h00m02s158%25255B10%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" height="306" /></a></div><br>We open with Uncle Jesse doing some actual farming, when some raccoon runs up, brandishing a letter from the kids. Turns out this raccoon is named Smokey, and he’s Uncle Jesse’s pet. Jesse regales the raccoon with the details of their last stop, in Ireland. <br><br> <div id="scid:8747F07C-CDE8-481f-B0DF-C6CFD074BF67:0275b85f-ebec-4766-a408-14406fd5d6aa" class="wlWriterEditableSmartContent" style="float: none; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-left: 0px; margin-left: auto; display: block; padding-right: 0px; width: 335px; margin-right: auto"><a href="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-kon6XH3rhWk/UivbjIlwVuI/AAAAAAAAAmo/YRwSzsOZssE/vlcsnap-2013-09-07-17h26m03s94-8x6.png?imgmax=800" title="He reads some..." rel="thumbnail"><img border="0" src="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-GmnH01EoGdM/UivbkcI0X-I/AAAAAAAAAmw/QTarG4TggT8/vlcsnap-2013-09-07-17h26m03s94%25255B6%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" height="291" /></a></div> <div><br></div> <div id="scid:8747F07C-CDE8-481f-B0DF-C6CFD074BF67:18b0bf95-8012-4356-9240-0b6edc6245d2" class="wlWriterEditableSmartContent" style="float: none; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-left: 0px; margin-left: auto; display: block; padding-right: 0px; width: 335px; margin-right: auto"><a href="http://lh5.ggpht.com/--GEdC405OIg/Uivbn2MuvbI/AAAAAAAAAm4/123J1PbI1tg/vlcsnap-2013-09-07-17h27m51s208-8x6.png?imgmax=800" title="...then the raccoon reacts." rel="thumbnail"><img border="0" src="http://lh3.ggpht.com/--v_gA0BsGE0/UivbouVVMhI/AAAAAAAAAnA/vEePtzlAo7o/vlcsnap-2013-09-07-17h27m51s208%25255B3%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" height="291" /></a></div><br>I was really hoping the entire episode was just Jesse reading, and then Smokey reacting to what he’s heard, but alas, this was not to be. <br><br>Boss and Rosco are driving along, Rosco making weird stuttering noises that makes me think he’s having a stroke, and Boss saying stereotypical Southern things like “Fatback in a frying pan!” Rosco gloats about having flattened the General Lee’s tires (or tyres, as it’d be spelled in Ireland, or so I assume), so they’ll be far behind the Cadillac. , but no! They’re right behind, driving without haste, not caring that their home is at stake!<br><br> <div id="scid:8747F07C-CDE8-481f-B0DF-C6CFD074BF67:cff80cdb-5aef-4538-b328-26da84695228" class="wlWriterEditableSmartContent" style="float: none; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-left: 0px; margin-left: auto; display: block; padding-right: 0px; width: 335px; margin-right: auto"><a href="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-n2eknx9vt-E/UivbsZE3JRI/AAAAAAAAAnI/Pbz7dgau-a0/vlcsnap-2013-09-07-17h36m52s171-8x6.png?imgmax=800" title="Not a bad likeness of the car, really." rel="thumbnail"><img border="0" src="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-YBY8GEGFxD8/UivbtYvVu4I/AAAAAAAAAnQ/4Af41-WEg-o/vlcsnap-2013-09-07-17h36m52s171%25255B3%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" height="291" /></a></div><br>The General gets ahead, and Boss explains his plot of reporting the General Lee stolen to the Irish police, and reveals he’s stolen the title to the car, so when the Dukes get pulled over, they’ll be arrested! That Boss!<br><br> <div id="scid:8747F07C-CDE8-481f-B0DF-C6CFD074BF67:ba7e0dea-4f55-4c0c-8672-49398f9b3ee7" class="wlWriterEditableSmartContent" style="float: none; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-left: 0px; margin-left: auto; display: block; padding-right: 0px; width: 335px; margin-right: auto"><a href="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-OzxoB9nulbg/UivbwPf7tKI/AAAAAAAAAnY/zAhQEa_L54k/vlcsnap-2013-09-07-17h41m53s84-8x6.png?imgmax=800" title="If there weren't leprechauns, this could pretty much be an episode of the regular show!" rel="thumbnail"><img border="0" src="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-MsNWVy0G4kg/UivbxLSO7gI/AAAAAAAAAnc/IRp6jB4NiEg/vlcsnap-2013-09-07-17h41m53s84%25255B3%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" height="306" /></a></div><br>So the Dukes get arrested, and are told they will have to spend the night in jail. They are shocked, SHOCKED! Boss and Rosco come across the leprechauns, and capture one, making him reveal where his pot of gold is located. <div id="scid:8747F07C-CDE8-481f-B0DF-C6CFD074BF67:f3bd1902-b964-496c-8ffa-13d9dfd2905d" class="wlWriterEditableSmartContent" style="float: none; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-left: 0px; margin-left: auto; display: block; padding-right: 0px; width: 335px; margin-right: auto"><a href="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-MY7R119-_jc/Uivb1cI_3TI/AAAAAAAAAn4/yyZbCG9lZ2E/vlcsnap-2013-09-07-21h28m45s1-8x6.png?imgmax=800" title="Where the gold at?" rel="thumbnail"><img border="0" src="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-FyEag6JCHiY/Uivb2UaOmhI/AAAAAAAAAoA/d31l1FPwTJo/vlcsnap-2013-09-07-21h28m45s1%25255B5%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" height="291" /></a></div>The Dukes get out of jail, and head toward wherever it is they’re supposed to be going. I’m assuming it’s like an Amazing Race situation, where they have to collect clues wherever they stop so they can move on to the next area. Meanwhile, the leprechaun takes Boss and Rosco to a forested area, showing them where his gold is.<br><br> <div id="scid:8747F07C-CDE8-481f-B0DF-C6CFD074BF67:749fcbae-33fc-4392-96b6-43529f7b8fc6" class="wlWriterEditableSmartContent" style="float: none; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-left: 0px; margin-left: auto; display: block; padding-right: 0px; width: 335px; margin-right: auto"><a href="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-IemBO794hpA/Uivb6rFOZOI/AAAAAAAAAoI/8MCfyBVLjhY/vlcsnap-2013-09-07-21h35m03s167-8x6.png?imgmax=800" title="" Hey, nature's finally paying off!"" rel="thumbnail"><img border="0" src="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-SCUUIS-3vJo/Uivb79kogPI/AAAAAAAAAoQ/llEQXC5WYFw/vlcsnap-2013-09-07-21h35m03s167%25255B10%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" height="291" /></a></div><br>Rosco makes to let the leprechaun go, as he’s given his gold. Boss Hogg says “Hold the fuck on, Rosco! This guy’s gotta know where all his friends’ gold is! Let’s make him take us to it!”<br><br> <div id="scid:8747F07C-CDE8-481f-B0DF-C6CFD074BF67:83c9139a-3712-4be8-ba52-45e24f88217b" class="wlWriterEditableSmartContent" style="float: none; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-left: 0px; margin-left: auto; display: block; padding-right: 0px; width: 335px; margin-right: auto"><a href="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-gcNaOx2BtSs/Uivb_fCeMnI/AAAAAAAAAoY/kkH2SQLWLoY/vlcsnap-2013-09-07-21h38m45s44-8x6.png?imgmax=800" title="Boss Hogg: Dick." rel="thumbnail"><img border="0" src="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-PMk1sl4rGeg/UivcAU20aaI/AAAAAAAAAog/Nveebnk7cFg/vlcsnap-2013-09-07-21h38m45s44%25255B2%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" height="291" /></a></div><br>The Dukes are driving along, and swerve to avoid hitting a cart of leprechauns, tipping the General Lee over in the process. The leprechauns help them pull it back up, and ask them for a ride. The leprechauns fill them in on the Boss Hogg situation, and the Dukes agree to help.<br><br> <div id="scid:8747F07C-CDE8-481f-B0DF-C6CFD074BF67:a3959d3c-3cbb-4d58-a70f-777b43a57830" class="wlWriterEditableSmartContent" style="float: none; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-left: 0px; margin-left: auto; display: block; padding-right: 0px; width: 335px; margin-right: auto"><a href="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-3nzT_z6FDh8/UivcEKoZIBI/AAAAAAAAAoo/UOTDRHmtRTk/vlcsnap-2013-09-07-21h43m42s86-8x6.png?imgmax=800" title="Odd that it landed perfectly on its side." rel="thumbnail"><img border="0" src="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-UxrOaqJE7aQ/UivcFFI3CGI/AAAAAAAAAow/qVNPjrRbQxc/vlcsnap-2013-09-07-21h43m42s86%25255B3%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" height="291" /></a></div><br>Boss makes the leprechaun he captured haul out a bunch more gold until he tricks them into pulling out a nest of bees, causing them to flee. They are eventually captured by more leprechauns, who decide to take Boss and Rosco to the Grand Wizard, who’ll sort all this out.<br><br> <div id="scid:8747F07C-CDE8-481f-B0DF-C6CFD074BF67:e56e22a6-8c3e-47fe-a6f8-39ac5d8802a6" class="wlWriterEditableSmartContent" style="float: none; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-left: 0px; margin-left: auto; display: block; padding-right: 0px; width: 335px; margin-right: auto"><a href="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-iqojpiDhHQc/UivcHadZexI/AAAAAAAAAo4/MzMe26pkz1A/vlcsnap-2013-09-07-21h54m12s7-8x6.png?imgmax=800" title="He looks like the Cookie Crisp Wizard!" rel="thumbnail"><img border="0" src="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-bXICRi-LIh4/UivcIE9uxYI/AAAAAAAAApA/GyIhcFvGHn0/vlcsnap-2013-09-07-21h54m12s7%25255B2%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" height="291" /></a></div>The Grand Wizard wants to turn Boss into a warthog, but the Dukes convince him to just make Boss give them all his money. He reluctantly agrees, because the episode is almost over.<br><br> <div id="scid:8747F07C-CDE8-481f-B0DF-C6CFD074BF67:2117cffa-a15a-441a-a058-15e003459203" class="wlWriterEditableSmartContent" style="float: none; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-left: 0px; margin-left: auto; display: block; padding-right: 0px; width: 335px; margin-right: auto"><a href="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-Ccop_iHCybo/UivcLn22hvI/AAAAAAAAApI/cAHQxN8Ree0/vlcsnap-2013-09-07-21h57m48s95-8x6.png?imgmax=800" title="This really doesn't make the Grand Wizard any better than Boss." rel="thumbnail"><img border="0" src="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-lCAOLQazl5g/UivcM3WCZXI/AAAAAAAAApQ/SawzPhFG-AQ/vlcsnap-2013-09-07-21h57m48s95%25255B4%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" height="306" /></a></div><br>Back in Hazzard, Jesse finishes the letter, and tells Smokey the lesson of the day: if you take something that’s not yours, you can get into trouble. Smokey, having learned his lesson, gives Uncle Jesse back a can of peanuts he’d stolen. Jesse let him have some anyway.<br><br> <div id="scid:8747F07C-CDE8-481f-B0DF-C6CFD074BF67:089e912a-ee87-4ac0-85da-c8e7b925c40f" class="wlWriterEditableSmartContent" style="float: none; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-left: 0px; margin-left: auto; display: block; padding-right: 0px; width: 335px; margin-right: auto"><a href="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-ZN39g1aVKas/UivcRYRDPhI/AAAAAAAAApY/6p6sFYXIfLQ/vlcsnap-2013-09-07-22h00m10s1-8x6.png?imgmax=800" title="That's not sanitary!" rel="thumbnail"><img border="0" src="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-Sn5z2fp_Bjk/UivcTbRDjNI/AAAAAAAAApg/QIKRrRs2rqk/vlcsnap-2013-09-07-22h00m10s1%25255B1%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" height="291" /></a></div> Jay Dukehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15329005721647143286noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139039015033528047.post-75354864105311492072013-08-31T20:30:00.003-04:002013-08-31T22:12:55.019-04:00Season 1, Episode 13: “Double Sting” – Originally Aired 5-11-1979<i>In which the season comes to a close, and the bank robbers dress like Laurel and Hardy…</i><br />
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Bo and Luke are driving around at what is supposed to be night time, but it’s obviously daytime with the brightness dropped down. Some asshole drives up beside them and rams the crap out of the General Lee, eventually running it off the road. Bo and Luke wonder what the fuck is going on as he drives off.<br />
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<a href="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-5CIEHcn-qOE/UiKJ2UwR3MI/AAAAAAAAAjA/67k7_gBMUGs/vlcsnap-2013-08-31-16h03m38s10-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="For one thing, shouldn't the headlights be shining onto the road in front of the cars?"><img border="0" height="306" src="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-Zq0ZTfiLcKo/UiKJ2wxsHGI/AAAAAAAAAjE/ukE9m_vWKZY/vlcsnap-2013-08-31-16h03m38s10%25255B5%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
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They get to the Boar’s Nest, where Luke has seen the car parked outside. The driver starts giving Daisy shit, and Bo punches the guy in his face.<br />
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<a href="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-Yk0V53Yn5cQ/UiKJ3whNK4I/AAAAAAAAAjQ/IS5RZN6jHZg/vlcsnap-2013-08-31-16h17m54s72-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="BAM!"><img border="0" height="291" src="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-tO5lmbXlNQ8/UiKJ4gkL62I/AAAAAAAAAjU/8IW24yz9cRA/vlcsnap-2013-08-31-16h17m54s72%25255B1%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
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A fight ensues, and the guy is arrested, along with Bo and Luke. The camera then pans over to these creepy guys who have been sitting and watching the whole thing. They are obviously going to be important later, BUT HOW?!<br />
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<a href="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-AkEoAUjxRDI/UiKJ5eEwQVI/AAAAAAAAAjc/nHdC38PVSys/vlcsnap-2013-08-31-16h19m43s215-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="Yeesh, no wonder they're sitting by themselves."><img border="0" height="291" src="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-HjMm4witXxI/UiKJ6KtmpKI/AAAAAAAAAjk/vl0GeALRiVE/vlcsnap-2013-08-31-16h19m43s215%25255B2%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
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At the jail, Uncle Jesse pays the $200 to get Bo and Luke out of jail, and then proceeds to tear the boys a new one, as that money was supposed to go toward the mortgage payment. There was originally going to be a piece here where I figured out if that was a fair price for a farm payment in the location and era, but after an hour of digging, I came to the conclusion that I don’t have enough data. It was a fun exercise though, until it wasn’t. <br />
<div class="wlWriterEditableSmartContent" id="scid:8747F07C-CDE8-481f-B0DF-C6CFD074BF67:73f0926e-a3ff-48ff-a23e-b839c07ff9fe" style="display: block; float: none; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; width: 335px;">
<a href="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-tt2YnKF6k0U/UiKJ6xG4P-I/AAAAAAAAAjo/AHcB5YxmKU4/vlcsnap-2013-08-31-16h56m01s214-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="Thanks a lot, Bo and Luke! Hope that punch was worth it!"><img border="0" height="306" src="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-69a8YGBKuhc/UiKJ7tFrXUI/AAAAAAAAAjw/XbYDbyeo-FI/vlcsnap-2013-08-31-16h56m01s214%25255B2%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
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As they’re making to leave, Doc Petticord, the local physician, bursts in and tells everyone they are now under quarantine, as the guy Bo punched appears to have some sort of plague. He then fondly recalls the “Hog Cholera Epidemic of ‘43, but that was mostly pigs!” Jesse is all “Well, great, if we don’t get the mortgage payment in by midnight, we lose the farm!” Outside, the doctor cheerily hangs the Quarantine sign up, observed by the creepers from the bar.<br />
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<div class="wlWriterEditableSmartContent" id="scid:8747F07C-CDE8-481f-B0DF-C6CFD074BF67:c72cd58e-8672-45d9-96ce-14991b18eb31" style="display: block; float: none; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; width: 335px;">
<a href="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-EenrfDGVanQ/UiKJ8ry0ktI/AAAAAAAAAj8/O-kEAVDRmvk/vlcsnap-2013-08-31-17h28m47s133-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="”Hot damn, something to do besides artificially inseminate cows!”"><img border="0" height="306" src="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-OT4xwRAzYac/UiKJ9Mo3ZzI/AAAAAAAAAkE/4emHagAvJ28/vlcsnap-2013-08-31-17h28m47s133%25255B6%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
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Boss bitches about there being nowhere to sleep that’s not down with the prisoners, and makes Rosco clean out a disused cell for him to sleep in. Boss Hogg accidentally gets locked in the cell, and the key breaks, trapping him in there for the rest of the episode. Luke calls Daisy and tells her about the situation, so she heads off to the bank to make the payment. <br />
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Outside the bank, one of the creepers sexually harasses Daisy, and she tells him to fuck off as she heads inside. The creepers proceed to put on scary-ass Laurel and Hardy masks and rob the bank. Daisy is able to slip outside in the confusion, and climbs on top of their RV to follow them. <br />
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<div class="wlWriterEditableSmartContent" id="scid:8747F07C-CDE8-481f-B0DF-C6CFD074BF67:56eaa1c1-51be-4566-97f9-317de73d0d84" style="display: block; float: none; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; width: 335px;">
<a a="" am="" are="" arrooo="" but="" crook="" href="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-vqB6KgdgSPQ/UiKJ-EiTyNI/AAAAAAAAAkQ/cpPRr9QnLTs/vlcsnap-2013-08-31-18h19m08s239-8x6.png?imgmax=800" i="" not="" rel="thumbnail" sure="" title="I think that's a Nixon mask back there, unless the disembodied head of the 37th president is just popping in. " two="" you=""><img border="0" height="335" src="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-M9DD9r-1vl8/UiKJ_EbGDOI/AAAAAAAAAkU/AwdoE7WMN98/vlcsnap-2013-08-31-18h19m08s239%25255B27%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
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As they drive by Hazzard Garage, Cooter sees Daisy on top of the RV and follows them. They see him, and shoot out his tire. I sure am glad Cooter followed them, he helped <i>so </i>much. At the jail, Rosco gets a phone call from the bank, and for once acts like a real cop, getting the details down while completely ignoring Boss Hogg’s constant cries of “How much money did they take?” Cooter calls and tells Rosco that he saw Daisy on top of the RV, and everyone fears the worst.<br />
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At the robbers’ hideout, the big guy watches a filmstrip of Laurel and Hardy and wistfully says “…funniest people in the world…” This is supremely unsettling; all that’s missing is a scary music track underneath it all. <br />
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<a href="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-SKUp0rGE3k4/UiKJ_5Vl6GI/AAAAAAAAAkg/5G57q3WryI4/vlcsnap-2013-08-31-19h32m07s186-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="Watch out, Itchy! He's Irish!"><img border="0" height="291" src="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-ZnY96BQiaTU/UiKKAc4F1tI/AAAAAAAAAko/hXyIyma116Y/vlcsnap-2013-08-31-19h32m07s186%25255B2%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
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Outside, Daisy breaks into the RV and tries to use the CB to call for help, when she’s grabbed by the skinny robber. The scene ends with her on the ground, the two guys standing over her, and the whole thing feels rather sexual assualt-y. <br />
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<a href="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-8t8frFduLWk/UiKKBbLySJI/AAAAAAAAAkw/06dneLhZckM/vlcsnap-2013-08-31-19h37m42s68-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="They don't, it just comes off really bad."><img border="0" height="291" src="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-l6Dj-OPY1OU/UiKKCSs8RNI/AAAAAAAAAk4/oZ-dULer-uI/vlcsnap-2013-08-31-19h37m42s68%25255B2%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
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At the jail, Jesse tells the boys that he’s pretty sure the guy who was arrested, Colt, is faking the plague,
and was probably in on the robbery to keep the cops occupied. Then he talks to a seemingly unconscious Colt about breaking out, inviting him to break out with them. They break out, and drive away in the General. Rosco radios for help, and is answered by the hardass Sheriff of Choctaw County, Emmett “Hammerhand” Ragsdale. He agrees to be on the lookout for the boys and Colt. Being pursued by Hammerhand, they make this iconic jump over a huge river, a shot of which appears in the logo of this blog.<br />
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<div class="wlWriterEditableSmartContent" id="scid:8747F07C-CDE8-481f-B0DF-C6CFD074BF67:a5a24995-1892-4e73-b302-591b56a06aca" style="display: block; float: none; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; width: 335px;">
<a href="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-Z47vt51vvMA/UiKKDL-dLxI/AAAAAAAAAlA/SlRntavgMwU/vlcsnap-2013-06-22-14h20m06s132-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="I hear that this was once a world record jump."><img border="0" height="291" src="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-DCQrgVBGbvc/UiKKDvVC3GI/AAAAAAAAAlI/Apn56kpL-2M/vlcsnap-2013-06-22-14h20m06s132%25255B4%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
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Stopping to rest, the boys convince Colt to take them to his boss under the pretext of joining up with the gang. He then tells them that he faked the plague by being allergic to poison ivy and covering the rash with duct tape until he was in jail, at which point he revealed the rash. He then faked all the other symptoms. So, is the Hazzard doctor just the worst, or what? Can’t even tell a poison ivy rash…<br />
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So Colt steal the General Lee and goes to the hideout, and everyone bickers while Daisy stands around looking pretty. When they all go inside, Cooter pops up from the General Lee’s trunk.<br />
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<a a="" albuquerque="" at="" href="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-kn-ZnPDbBXs/UiKKERzhgDI/AAAAAAAAAlQ/lmmsCojeGw0/vlcsnap-2013-08-31-19h57m30s249-8x6.png?imgmax=800" i="" like="" looks="" rel="thumbnail" title="" took="" turn="" wrong=""><img border="0" height="291" src="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-ye1yzkmziGs/UiKKFL96MxI/AAAAAAAAAlU/my_eaAsmkKM/vlcsnap-2013-08-31-19h57m30s249%25255B5%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
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Inside, the robbers plan to throw Daisy in the RV and sink it, thus eliminating all evidence and witnesses. Cooter contacts the boys via CB and tells them where he is and what’s going on. Everyone else overhears and heads that way, too. Cooter lets the air out of the RV’s tires and is caught by Colt, who takes him inside. The big guy tells the little guy and Colt to sink them both in the RV, then they’ll escape in the General. Then all hell breaks loose.<br />
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<a href="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-lx9OCXyvO-0/UiKKGbnlP8I/AAAAAAAAAlg/lCN_Y9x0Pdo/vlcsnap-2013-08-31-20h09m11s132-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="Gather 'round, kids! It's Collateral Damage!"><img border="0" height="291" src="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-7DZawkpzw4g/UiKKG2Gj4yI/AAAAAAAAAlo/Pb9nOxI6gFo/vlcsnap-2013-08-31-20h09m11s132%25255B6%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
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Everyone else gets there and Luke starts shooting dynamite arrows all over the damn place, and Bo pushes the building into the lake with Cooter’s truck! That is fucking astonishing that a ‘69 Chevy C-10 could move an entire building, but hey, it’s the season finale, and my ability to be shocked by this show is waning every week. Rosco prepares to arrest the crooks, but is shot down by Hammerhand! He makes the arrest, and flirts with Daisy. And with that, Season 1 is over.<br />
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<a bely="" big="" buckle="" har="" href="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-QhKjU2Q3Q6s/UiKKH1t-WuI/AAAAAAAAAlw/wz20jBTcJbA/hsmmerhand-8x6.png?imgmax=800" if="" is="" my="" rel="thumbnail" s="" see="" should="" think="" this="" title="" under="" what="" you=""><img border="0" height="306" src="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-3eqlwr19Hs4/UiKKIbLDBjI/AAAAAAAAAl4/0OFsL-XKB8U/hsmmerhand%25255B2%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
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I want to sincerely thank everyone who’s been reading along and occasionally commenting, I hope I hjaven’t bored anyone to tears yet. A very special thanks to Billy Superstar over at <a href="http://fullhousereviewed.com/" target="_blank">Full House Reviewed</a> for linking to me, I really appreciate it.<br />
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There’s still six seasons to go, and it only gets more ridiculous from here on out, so stick around!There will be a little something special next week, and after that, Season 2! Thanks again!Jay Dukehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15329005721647143286noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139039015033528047.post-8100930267669917762013-08-24T19:04:00.005-04:002013-08-24T19:04:52.927-04:00Season 1, Episode 12: “Route 7-11” – Originally Aired 5-4-1979<i>In which the Dukes’ friend gets took, so they take the takers…</i><br />
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The Dukes take the General Lee over to Cooter, who informs them that the car is going to need $180 worth of repairs. They freak out, as they need the General to be in top shape for the big race that they seem to enter every damn week. They can’t afford that, so Cooter tells them to get a job, and tells them about a job he heard about, driving a semi truck. <br />
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Meanwhile, Boss Hogg is drinking mint juleps while talking to Rosco, because how stereotypical can you get? They see a semi drive through, containing one Helen Hogan, who is known to both Boss and Rosco as a swindler extraordinaire. He tells Rosco to tail her.<br /> <br />
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<a href="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-GVrq-Gr3jTU/Uhk62V0jUuI/AAAAAAAAAgg/ylS4LfdZC8E/vlcsnap-2013-08-24-17h32m12s52-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="Helen Hogan Hustles Harmless Hardware Honcho! Film at 11!"><img border="0" src="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-015u2BqvbiY/Uhk63dj-XYI/AAAAAAAAAgk/RX_mMH-KFxY/vlcsnap-2013-08-24-17h32m12s52%25255B16%25255D.png?imgmax=800" height="306" width="335" /></a></div>
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Bo and Luke convince her to hire them, after Luke pulls some fancy maneuvers with the truck. On their way home, they run into an old family friend, Dewey Stovall, and invite him over to dinner the next night. <br />
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<a called="" dog="" href="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-0EHZr9RSOq0/Uhk64MWHE3I/AAAAAAAAAgw/B6S7EjKvR7E/vlcsnap-2013-08-24-17h38m20s94-8x6.png?imgmax=800" indiana="" rel="thumbnail" the="" title="" we=""><img border="0" src="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-97i2nE9bO4E/Uhk640c2qFI/AAAAAAAAAg4/hEXk2FJombY/vlcsnap-2013-08-24-17h38m20s94%25255B6%25255D.png?imgmax=800" height="291" width="335" /></a></div>
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The next morning, Helen Hogan explains that she runs a company that makes shock absorbers, and that all the people piling into the tractor trailer are potential investors wanting to check out the product in action. As they’re driving around, Luke says he doesn’t believe the story about the shocks, and climbs onto the trailer to peek into the vents. He does so, an sees that they're really running an illegal casino out of the trailer. Not only that, they’re running a CROOKED illegal casino! Luke also sees that Dewey is being taken in by Helen Hogan and Co.<br /> <br />
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<a href="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-3ynczSrHsdM/Uhk65x8m-gI/AAAAAAAAAhA/wJYZxlSP5wM/vlcsnap-2013-08-24-17h46m13s230-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="The foot switch to stop the roulette wheel. What's the world coming to when you can't trust the purveyors of a mobile gambling house?"><img border="0" src="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-dwWk1tZesjM/Uhk66b5h_6I/AAAAAAAAAhI/f5KitRqp0TE/vlcsnap-2013-08-24-17h46m13s230%25255B13%25255D.png?imgmax=800" height="320" width="335" /></a></div>
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Back at the farm, Daisy is talking to Dewey, who has arrived for dinner, and the camera shows us a nice shot of her ass.<br /> <br />
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<a href="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-PfVb-8ta2TM/Uhk68sdQDHI/AAAAAAAAAhQ/nNHJy0phOWI/vlcsnap-2013-08-24-18h01m26s109-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="It's like she was poured into them!"><img border="0" src="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-hVE-GGkR8co/Uhk6-I1pjcI/AAAAAAAAAhY/k5YmoxrLtHg/vlcsnap-2013-08-24-18h01m26s109%25255B7%25255D.png?imgmax=800" height="291" width="335" /></a></div>
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Dewey explains that he was gambling his money to fix up his hardware store so he could compete with a chain store that had moved in near him. Luke comes up with a plan to steal back the money that Helen Hogan stole from Dewey, which really isn’t much of a plan.<br />
<br />
After a failed attempt to steal the safe from the truck, which was so uneventful I’m not even going to recap it, they go to Uncle Jesse for help, asking him to pose as a high roller gambler. He refuses, as the <a href="http://dukesofhazzardreviewed.blogspot.com/2013/06/season-one-episode-one-one-armed.html" target="_blank">Dukes don’t hold with no gambling</a>. Luke says that Jesse probably couldn’t pull it off anyway, and he rightly schools everyone with his awesome card-handling abilities. Anyway, he reluctantly agrees to help. <b>Note: According to </b><a href="http://comforttv.blogspot.com/2013/08/emmys-schmemmys.html" target="_blank"><b>David Hofstede’s</b></a><b> <u>The Dukes of Hazzard: The Unofficial Companion</u>, John Schneider is actually doing Jesse’s card tricks.</b> <br />
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<a href="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-a3to1UctnhE/Uhk6_bhc5tI/AAAAAAAAAhg/DAGMKsIEh-4/vlcsnap-2013-08-24-18h18m57s122-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="And these are clearly not the hands of a man in his late 50s. "><img border="0" src="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-LYohTQ24rmY/Uhk6_0fyI1I/AAAAAAAAAho/wrAvw88shlg/vlcsnap-2013-08-24-18h18m57s122%25255B3%25255D.png?imgmax=800" height="306" width="335" /></a></div>
<br />
So, the next morning, Luke rigs up a switch in the cab of the truck that will override the wheel switch in the trailer. Jesse and Daisy arrive, dressed to the nines, and Daisy is posing as Jesse’s floozy.<br /> <br />
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<a and="" cakes="" eww.="" hot="" href="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-v6pSQyIGxAk/Uhk7BTxeypI/AAAAAAAAAhw/CIiiZwMhKm8/vlcsnap-2013-08-24-18h32m48s171-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" such.="" title="Seriously, she keeps calling him "><img border="0" src="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-bCrtZdsx3rk/Uhk7CDQ5rbI/AAAAAAAAAh4/b4ICr7ajRls/vlcsnap-2013-08-24-18h32m48s171%25255B6%25255D.png?imgmax=800" height="306" width="335" /></a></div>
<br />
Once they’re on the road, Cooter swings by in the General Lee, and Luke jumps into the car, driving off to chase Rosco, who has been tailing the trailer the entire episode. Bo honks the horn of the truck, which gives Jesse the signal to bet on roulette. He wins, because of the switch override Bo is using. Rosco confronts Luke, who tells them where the truck is heading, and they speed away to head it off.<br />
<br />
In the truck, Jesse moves to the poker table, where he is seated between the dealer and the house shill. He’s dealt a great hand, but is smart enough to know that the house is making to fuck him over in the next hand. He throws away two cards of his hand, an ace high full house. Helen Hogan gets nervous and tries to dissuade him, but he insists, and so the dealer gives him the cards meant for the shill. Jesse wins!<br /> <br />
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<br />
Everyone convenes at the crossroads, and the casino is busted up. Boss makes to take Jesse’s winnings, but the Dukes say it’s their winnings, and throw the bag into a passing General Lee. Jesse explains that the state police have been alerted to the operation, and that they told the police that Boss deserves all the credit. He’s understandably dismayed.<br />
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Luke meets up with Dewey at the county line, who explains that he is going to use the money to try and win at a reputable casino in another county.<br /> <br />
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<a a="" friend="" haven="" href="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-9-rUqO6saqo/Uhk7FwoMTNI/AAAAAAAAAiQ/C0PPXSnhstY/vlcsnap-2013-08-24-18h55m22s152-8x6.png?imgmax=800" i="" learned="" luke="" my="" rel="thumbnail" t="" thing="" title=""><img border="0" src="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-Wwfxlo9xDWM/Uhk7Ggaz08I/AAAAAAAAAiY/rXxSZ2MvXFI/vlcsnap-2013-08-24-18h55m22s152%25255B6%25255D.png?imgmax=800" height="291" width="335" /></a></div>
<br />
As for Helen Hogan, she went on to raise her deceased sister’s children, including her oldest son, Michael Bluth.<br /> <br />
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<a href="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-Btgl7GsJSZg/Uhk7IDOpVjI/AAAAAAAAAig/c-Afva-5RnY/hogan-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="On the actual Hogan Family, did Sandy Duncan marry her dead sister's husband? Makes me wonder if they plotted it out..."><img border="0" src="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-q095VB83XJc/Uhk7f8gSuNI/AAAAAAAAAiw/cDYt3cFzGLU/hogan%25255B15%25255D.png?imgmax=800" height="301" width="335" /></a></div>
Jay Dukehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15329005721647143286noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139039015033528047.post-84677295566754744632013-08-17T22:39:00.002-04:002013-08-17T22:39:43.210-04:00Season 1, Episode 11: “Money to Burn” – Originally Aired 4-20-1979<i>In which the Dukes are actually not in the wrong at all! That’s refreshing…</i><br />
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After nearly three real-world minutes of Enos chasing the Dukes around, we open at the Hazzard bank, where Boss Hogg is counting out one million dollars in bills that have become too tattered so he can send them to be burned and exchanged with fresh bills by the Atlanta branch of the Federal Reserve.<br />
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Boss then tells Rosco his plan, which is to have the armored car driven by his cousin, Cletus, to burn up in an accident while transporting the money, and that the money bag will be filled with old phone books instead of money. Again, he’s doing this out in the middle of the bank floor, instead of his office. <br />
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So, Cletus pulls off to the side of some back road and explodes the truck. Bo and Luke happen to be in the area and turn around to go see what’s up. They come upon Cletus, who claims that the truck just blew up, and that he was thrown clear of the blast. Bo and Luke believe him, even though he doesn’t have a scratch or scorch mark on him. He feebly protests as they put the fire out and retrieve the remains of the phone books. After Boss yells at Cletus, he resolves to frame the Dukes for the theft and collect the insurance money.<br />
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At the farm, the Dukes are in a tight spot, money-wise (aren’t they always?), and Bo says he and Luke will get some if they win the Hazzard Derby, but they need $5 to enter. Jesse goes to check the rainy day fund, and finds that it’s full of money! Daisy calls them all into her room, where there’s a ton of money just spread out on her bed. Did somebody (probably Bo) acquire a mysterious severed hand and make a wish with it?<br />
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So, they’re all celebrating when Rosco and Enos pull up, telling them that someone hijacked the armored truck, and making it <i>super obvious</i> that he planted the money. He goes to pour himself some coffee, and, surprise surprise, it’s full of money! Rosco arrests the boys, while I wonder how he got into the house and planted the money. Surely someone must have been home, and it’s only been a few hours since the truck incident.<br />
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<a href="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-8s5T6oiZfZo/UhAvqDGpcBI/AAAAAAAAAeI/NY15MCCsIyQ/vlcsnap-2013-08-16-21h45m24s235-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="That's not sanitary!"><img border="0" height="291" src="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-egCcFYLKwk8/UhAvq2C66MI/AAAAAAAAAeQ/Hsyy26W-dmM/vlcsnap-2013-08-16-21h45m24s2351.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
A scuffle ensues, and the boys get away, despite Enos Hulking out and smashing his way through their back door in pursuit.<br />
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<a href="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-it3k4DirFQ0/UhAvr3_nwNI/AAAAAAAAAeY/VsPqtVjW69M/vlcsnap-2013-08-16-21h50m59s13-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="ENOS SMASH!"><img border="0" height="291" src="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-R7qy1ZieKP0/UhAvsjrPevI/AAAAAAAAAeg/jkUr4GZEa5Y/vlcsnap-2013-08-16-21h50m59s139.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
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The boys make their way over to Cooter’s, where he’s painting a hearse for Boss, as he apparently runs moonshine in hearses up to Nashville. This is a brilliant move, as who’s gonna pull over a hearse? Nobody, that’s who. They hide when Rosco arrives, asking Cooter to hang up one of these sweet wanted posters of Bo and Luke.<br />
<div class="wlWriterEditableSmartContent" id="scid:8747F07C-CDE8-481f-B0DF-C6CFD074BF67:52b955ab-2bfa-4fe0-ac5f-a2de569d75d4" style="display: block; float: none; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; width: 335px;">
<a href="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-4BUncxW2KPg/UhAvuB1fVBI/AAAAAAAAAeo/Zk-jiMLKDac/vlcsnap-2013-08-16-21h59m16s64-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="They're not even mug shots! They're clearly publicity shots of Schneider and Wopat."><img border="0" height="306" src="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-Y_5wPcrsX-o/UhAvu4Gt2CI/AAAAAAAAAew/4Gv90yPtjkw/vlcsnap-2013-08-16-21h59m16s641.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
The boys overhear Boss telling Rosco (via the CB radio) to meet him at “the place,” and decide to follow him, borrowing Cooter’s truck to do so, as the General Lee is too conspicuous. This may be true, but Cooter’s gotta be pretty well known. Wouldn’t Rosco wonder why Cooter was following him and get suspicious?<br />
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Anyway, they follow Rosco to the Hazzard County Coffin Works. For a rural backwater, Hazzard seems to have just about everything: a bank, an armored car company, and a coffin works. What’s next, a regional outpost of the Royal Canadian Mounted Police?<br />
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They see Boss meet Rosco and take a money bag filled with something inside, and sneak in after them, climbing up to the roof, Batman-style!<br />
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They peek in a hole in the roof, where Boss reveals that he’s going to bury the ratty million dollars in a coffin under the name Don McDougall, to collect an additional insurance premium, and then dig it up when everything blows over. I bet the Federal Reserve would log the serial numbers of the bills, so when he spent the money, he'd get busted, but it’s just a TV show, I should really just relax. Anyway, Bo and Luke take off.<br />
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Back at the farm, Jesse yells at them for coming back there, as that’s the first place the cops and federal agents will look. Luke explains that he has a plan, and tells Jesse to have any federal agents that might come calling meet Bo and Luke in the town square, where they’ll get their money back. <br />
Bo and Luke go to the Coffin Works in a hearse, while Daisy, driving the General Lee and wearing a helmet that says “Bo Duke” on it, distracts Rosco and Co. into chasing her, thinking it’s Bo.<br /> <br />
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<a all="" bo="" duke="" href="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-VYdnf1hN7ks/UhAv01aFM5I/AAAAAAAAAfY/I8tMbO9xUmo/vlcsnap-2013-08-17-21h51m27s27-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" right="" title="She's giving herself away, albeit subtly. She's "><img border="0" height="306" src="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-lGobpbsu_nY/UhAv1vzxlZI/AAAAAAAAAfg/_Fp4FGt4QdE/vlcsnap-2013-08-17-21h51m27s27%25255B16%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
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While they’re chasing her, Bo and Luke tell the guard they’re new guys, here to make a run to Atlanta. He believes them until he checks his paperwork, and there IS no run to Atlanta today! The boys respond by locking the poor guy into a coffin and grabbing the money.<br /> <br />
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<a body="" dead="" href="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-JkBGFNdoyJU/UhAv2cSUWBI/AAAAAAAAAfo/GSIX3auxkyE/vlcsnap-2013-08-17-21h58m10s98-8x6.png?imgmax=800" ll="" make="" over="" rel="thumbnail" run="" say="" the="" title="" we="" you="" your=""><img border="0" height="306" src="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-fHhtWtpJX_g/UhAv3HtrGyI/AAAAAAAAAfs/czNwISHic2s/vlcsnap-2013-08-17-21h58m10s98%25255B3%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
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They get to the meeting place with the bonding agents, only to find that they grabbed a coffin full of moonshine instead of the money! Uh oh!<br /> <br />
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<a href="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-IBcV54uCozo/UhAv3xpXLHI/AAAAAAAAAf4/fM2Yh_3Ul1k/vlcsnap-2013-08-17-22h04m41s105-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="Why didn't they look before they got there? They certainly had time."><img border="0" height="306" src="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-OhnEv9t6gds/UhAv4jXHF_I/AAAAAAAAAgA/AWh0_7JLIOo/vlcsnap-2013-08-17-22h04m41s105%25255B2%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
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The agents are suspicious, especially when the boys speed off, so they follow, eventually leading them back to the coffin works, where Boss is getting ready to bury the coffin full of money. He conducts the fake eulogy for McDougall, slipping sly references to the coffin being full of money. The coroner pipes up and says this person’s named McDonald, and that McDougall is being cremated right that instant. <br />
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Boss freaks out and runs inside to try and stop it. The bond agents, having recently arrived, follow Bo and Luke in after Boss. Bo shows them the money in the coffin, and while Boss is trying to explain, the money gets burned up.<br /> <br />
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Jay Dukehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15329005721647143286noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139039015033528047.post-42475843647718906832013-08-10T18:55:00.000-04:002013-08-10T18:55:00.076-04:00Season 1, Episode 10: “Deputy Dukes” – Originally Aired 4-13-1979<i>In which the Dukes become deputies and meet a minor country singer…</i><br />
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The General Lee is tailing an unfamiliar convertible down some back road. This is weird, until it’s revealed that Bo and Luke are attempting to get some strange. The girls suggest going skinny dipping in the nearby lake, and the boys readily agree. Bo and Luke strip down and get in the water, only to have the girls run off with their clothes and the money that they had won in something called a “Snipe Hunting Contest.”<br />
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<a a="" apples="" bo="" do="" don="" gonna="" href="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-9r9geFDYmU0/UgbDH-vuZrI/AAAAAAAAAag/mafFhVVEphg/vlcsnap-2013-08-09-17h53m22s81-8x6.png?imgmax=800" i="" like="" re="" rel="thumbnail" sound="" t="" the="" them="" title="" we="" what=""><img border="0" height="306" src="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-XhMvKJh80Gk/UgbDIvbfzLI/AAAAAAAAAao/j1qDO00OfOg/vlcsnap-2013-08-09-17h53m22s8110.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
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They hot-wire their car and chase after the thieves, who have just sped past Rosco. He gives chase, and Bo and Luke catch up to him and slam into Rosco’s car, causing the door to fall off. I’m not sure that this could actually happen, but hey, it’s funny. He arrests them for a whole bunch of charges, including indecent exposure. So, they end up stuck in jail, and our story can really begin <br />
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At the jail, Rosco receives a phone call from the chief of police of neighboring Springville County. He explains that the very deadly criminal Rocky Marlowe (Rosco refers to him as “Public Enemy One Through Ten”) has been granted a change of venue from Springville over to Hazzard, and request that Rosco send someone to get him. Shouldn’t they just bring him out there themselves? I mean, they’ve been around this guy, know if he’s gonna be a problem or not, etc. Is this how real changes of venue work? <br />
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Anyway, Rosco eventually sends the Dukes, deputizing them in the process. He threatens to sell the General Lee out from under them to pay their fines if they don’t cooperate. They refuse his offer to carry guns, citing their probation. I’m assuming Rosco was involved in setting their probation in the first place, couldn’t he waive it temporarily?<br />
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<a and="" be="" breaking="" d="" do="" guns="" href="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-diabaKPPf-U/UgbDJlowSYI/AAAAAAAAAaw/rp8e-qI3mes/vlcsnap-2013-08-10-10h56m57s254-8x6.png?imgmax=800" law="" never="" no="" rel="thumbnail" thank="" that="" the="" title="" we="" you=""><img border="0" height="306" src="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-2ToX5xrISPc/UgbDKesYUSI/AAAAAAAAAa4/qe_fgIiTkPI/vlcsnap-2013-08-10-10h56m57s2546.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
<br />So, they’re both super embarrassed about the whole situation, and try to sneak out of town as quickly as possible to go pick up Marlowe. Unfortunately, they run into Daisy, who makes them explain the whole thing, and she swears not to tell Uncle Jesse. They also are noticed by this old guy, who doesn’t say anything, he just sort of mugs for the camera. I don’t know why he’s even there, or why they felt the need to zoom in on him.<br /> <div class="wlWriterEditableSmartContent" id="scid:8747F07C-CDE8-481f-B0DF-C6CFD074BF67:9f62cb87-3624-47b8-b9f8-33ca566ce0b7" style="display: block; float: none; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; width: 335px;">
<a ...no="" abner="" and="" believe="" dukes="" href="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-gI2qc1emMpM/UgbDLT_zvxI/AAAAAAAAAbA/O1GIwYSR5V0/vlcsnap-2013-08-10-11h12m30s97-8x6.png?imgmax=800" i="" in="" no="" one="" policeman="" rel="thumbnail" s="" should="" stupid="" tell="" that="" the="" title="" town="" uniforms="" whole="" would="" you=""><img border="0" height="320" src="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-feS9uj-BUp0/UgbDL1VD_pI/AAAAAAAAAbE/qZd8oqydKCg/vlcsnap-2013-08-10-11h12m30s979.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
The boys arrive in Springville, which looks suspiciously like a slightly redressed Hazzard County. The sheriff thre informs them that they’re taking Marlowe, which Rosco neglected to tell them, and they’re being assisted by one Officer Price, the best sharpshooter that the Springville PD has to offer!<br />
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<a href="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-n93Cej1Ax8o/UgbDM2kZUBI/AAAAAAAAAbQ/0eqP3QR5Q6U/vlcsnap-2013-08-10-13h03m41s13-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="Hey everyone, it's Stella Parton, sister of Dolly, and a minor country star in her own right! *applause*"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-JFk8R9g8PDs/UgbDNQ8Bp9I/AAAAAAAAAbY/gDhbTqhQRG8/vlcsnap-2013-08-10-13h03m41s136.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
So they all head off, only to be tailed by Marlowe’s goons, who are trying to use the change of venue to break their boss out. This leads to a car chase that lasts for literally three and a half minutes (I timed it), during which some guy repeatedly tries in vain to get out of his truck, only to have the cars speed by him, as they are doing a Daisy-style chase by driving around in a circle. Why he doesn’t just get out the passenger’s side door escapes me.<br />
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Back at Springville PD, the cops pull the <i>real </i>Officer Price out of the trunk of a car, which makes one wonder who the fuck that other lady is.<br />
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So, the real Officer Price explains that the Stella Parton knocked her out and stole her uniform and transfer papers, while Chief Lacey tries to get ahold of the Dukes, who are unresponsive. They have abandoned their cop car in favor of the Ecto-1, to try and escape the notice of Marlowe’s men.<br /> <br />
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The car breaks down, and while the boys are outside fixing it, Stella tells Marlowe that she’ll break him loose when the time is right. Meanwhile, back in Hazzard, boss and Rosco lay out plans to turn Hazzard into a tourist town for when Marlowe’s trial commences. Daisy has told Jesse what was going on, and he is furious that they’d send the boys unarmed, so he tears Boss and Rosco a new one. Rosco gets a phone call telling him about the whole fake Officer Price thing, and Jesse resolves to go help Rosco and Enos save them, finally letting Daisy come along. Cooter also tags along, as what else does he have to do? <br />
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Bo and Luke and Marlowe and Stella Parton take off on foot after being chased by the gunmen, and eventually come up on the girls who took their clothes and money from the beginning of the episode. Seems they’ve just fucked over the Springville equivalent of Bo and Luke, so the boys take their car as retribution. <br /> <br />
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They see their newly acquired car is out of gas, and stop into the local ghost town of Possum Hollow to get gas. Why would there be a gas station in a ghost town? They get to the gas station and the guy won’t fill them up without an account, so they go inside to fill out the paperwork. While they’re doing so, Stella Parton lets Marlowe go, and then, once he gets a little ways, confronts him. She’s the daughter of one of Marlowe’s former associates that Marlowe framed, and wants revenge!<br /> <br />
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<a a="" as="" at="" becaise="" dollywood="" gonna="" greeter="" href="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-HTctQQrwdXY/UgbDWr8-I0I/AAAAAAAAAcw/NaZ1wlwS5uU/vlcsnap-2013-08-10-18h32m50s189-8x6.png?imgmax=800" i="" life="" m="" my="" of="" rel="thumbnail" rest="" spend="" the="" title="" you=""><img border="0" height="306" src="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-V-x4tJiU-8M/UgbDXYAQ4rI/AAAAAAAAAc0/9K6_nf9tbYI/vlcsnap-2013-08-10-18h32m50s189%25255B6%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
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Everyone else arrives on the scene as the boys are in the midst of a rooftop shootout with Marlowe, who then jumps down and takes thee boys’ car. They shoot out the radiator with an arrow, and Marlowe’s men take Stella Parton and drive off, at which point Bo stops them with a dynamite arrow. The criminals are arrested and taken back to Hazzard. Marlowe gets another change of venue, so Boss doesn’t get to build his tourist town, and Bo and Luke go boar hunting. Somehow, Stella Parton doesn’t get in trouble for knocking out Officer Price.<br /> <br />
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Jay Dukehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15329005721647143286noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139039015033528047.post-50778571560370994662013-08-03T22:27:00.002-04:002013-08-03T22:27:36.366-04:00Season 1, Episode 9: “Limo One is Missing” – Originally Aired 4-6-1979<i>In which Boss Hogg is cheated out of a call from the President of the United States of America...</i> <br />
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We open with a limousine driving through Hazzard, and the Balladeer tells us that it’s the official limo of the President of the United States, who apparently sends the car ahead to wherever he’s going to be (I assume Atlanta, as why else would they be in Hazzard). They stop for gas at the Boar’s Nest, because where else are they going to go?<br />
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Inside, they order coffee and hit on Daisy, while Bo tries to get rid of a bad case of hiccups. This minor plotline runs through the episode, presumably to give John Schneider something to do. There was a similar plotline in last week’s show, where he had a pair of uncomfortable boots that finally split open on him. What’s next?<br />
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<a a="" and="" bed="" bo="" breaks="" cupboard="" dukes="" episode="" from="" get="" glass="" he="" hiding="" his="" href="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-AOd_HfcBvwc/Uf25ti9ZxkI/AAAAAAAAAXI/JSu3fKTL40w/tv-8x6.png?imgmax=800" it="" jesse="" of="" out="" rel="thumbnail" rest="" spends="" tall="" the="" title="TONIGHT ON " to="" tries="" uncle="" under=""><img border="0" height="316" src="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-enklnCw52Iw/Uf25uTdFOII/AAAAAAAAAXQ/OnP-mhvTqbQ/tv30.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
The boys head outside with Cooter and Cooter proceeds to steal the limo. Only then do the Secret Service guys realize they didn’t leave anyone watching the car. They rush off, fearing the wrath of the president, as there is nothing like an upset toddler. <br />
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<a damn="" finds="" going="" he="" his="" href="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-zpakZ_esT2o/Uf25viaKuTI/AAAAAAAAAXY/kNr66D2zhpw/vlcsnap-2013-08-02-22h48m19s122-8x6.png?imgmax=800" it="" literally="" out="" pants="" rel="thumbnail" s="" shit="" title="" to="" when=""><img border="0" height="287" src="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-XdjHzmfTTSM/Uf25wEhYDjI/AAAAAAAAAXc/QDagtuFU6Xg/vlcsnap-2013-08-02-22h48m19s1229.png?imgmax=800" width="310" /></a></div>
Bo and Luke are driving home, and see Cooter in the limo, pursued by the Secret Service guys. They, not wanting to get in the president’s good graces and maybe get off probation, fuck around and end up getting the Servicemen tossed in the lake.<br />
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Back at the farm, Jesse chews the boys out over the whole thing, and rightfully so! He points out that they are now accessories to Cooter’s felony, and tells them to help Cooter make sure the Feds find the car, and tells Bo to get rid of his goddamned hiccups!<br />
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<a href="http://lh4.ggpht.com/-YrqLA5MGDr4/Uf25ygWYjlI/AAAAAAAAAX4/509-EiI5FXk/vlcsnap-2013-08-02-23h55m23s9-8x6.png?imgmax=800" rel="thumbnail" title="He finds the hiccups offensive! I had a teacher like that once."><img border="0" height="287" src="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-7Ryg_UZUh24/Uf25zbyciFI/AAAAAAAAAYA/AmK7JFP_rrQ/vlcsnap-2013-08-02-23h55m23s95.png?imgmax=800" width="310" /></a></div>
Cooter reveals to the boys that the limo is currently in the Dukes’ barn, as he had to push it there when it ran out of gas. He says he’s sorry, but he doesn’t <i>seem </i>very sorry, more like “yeah, I stole the car, what of it? I wonder what’s on the TV?” They resolve to try and dump the car somewhere, but just then, Enos pulls up asking to search the barn. Luke knocks on the barn door, so Bo and Cooter push it out the back door and Enos doesn’t see the car. <br />
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The boys and Cooter put a gallon of gas into the limo and take off to go dump it. They are pursued by Rosco, but manage to evade him. Boss is not pleased, as he seems convinced that the president will be so thankful that he will not only receive a phone call, but that the president will call on him personally to deliver thanks. I think Boss is delusional.<br />
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The limo runs out of gas, so they stow it in a barn and head back to the farm to get more gas, so they can leave it at a certain spot, and Jesse will call it in for the FBI to pick it up. I don’t see why it needs to be driven any farther, or why they even bothered to stash it. Couldn’t they have just left it where it was when they ran out of gas and told the FBI, “Yeah, it’s over on Dog Dick Hollow Road,” and that would be that? I guess not, as we still have half the episode to go.<br />
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Enos spies on Daisy, who was told to distract him, and she leads him off on a chase, giving the boys time to do what they have to do.<br />
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Meanwhile, the boys come upon what appears to be a dead body sprawled out of a car in the middle of the road. They pull over and check it out, only to discover the guy’s still alive, and has a gun! His partner appears, and they steal the limo. Cooter says “Oh well! We got rid of it!” because he doesn’t care about anyone but himself. Luke point out that Uncle Jesse is still calling the whereabouts in, and therefore is going to be in a bunch of trouble. They run off on foot and are picked up by Daisy. <br />
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They head off down a back road and see Boss Hogg’s Cadillac waiting to get into a gate in the middle of the woods. They follow him in and find the guys that stole the limo, who have a chop shop back there, which is secretly run by Boss (gasp!). They contact Jesse and have him bring some bow and arrows, as they are going to play another exciting game of Collateral Damage!<br />
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Daisy distracts the guard by flashing her ass at him, letting Bo and Luke slip right by and head inside. The guard won’t come outside, so she walks off and pretends to get assaulted. Only then does he come to her aid, leaving the gate unwatched. <br />
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<a a="" can="" car="" crack="" have="" help="" href="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-5BYqbiIaUpM/Uf258Gz5hII/AAAAAAAAAZY/Cxunx41ueSA/vlcsnap-2013-08-03-21h43m48s11-8x6.png?imgmax=800" hurrr="" in="" it="" me="" mister="" my="" rear="" rel="thumbnail" seems="" the="" title="" to="" with="" you=""><img border="0" height="306" src="http://lh5.ggpht.com/-P85xnIzqXvo/Uf2589iIOXI/AAAAAAAAAZg/iOqFbPGDfe8/vlcsnap-2013-08-03-21h43m48s114.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
Bo and Luke get inside the upper level and fire some dynamite arrows into the chop shop, causing yet another giant explosion. They then jump down to the floor, affording us a nice view of their stuntmen. <br />
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They then take the limo back to wherever they were going to drop it off, and Jesse gets a phone call from the president thanking him for everything. How nice!<br />
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Tune in next week when John Schneider, sick of having plotlines involving hiccups and sore feet, writes his OWN damn show:<br /> <br />
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<a a="" across="" and...="" and="" army="" around="" bo="" comes="" crazy="" dukes="" episode="" evil="" exposes="" href="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-L7XId9zjH08/Uf26BQvfy1I/AAAAAAAAAaI/szoLpPExxCM/tv2-8x6.png?imgmax=800" in="" multiples="" of="" person="" potion="" rel="thumbnail" running="" s="" scientist="" see="" some="" soon="" that="" there="" this="" title="" to="" type="" who="" whole="" you=""><img border="0" height="330" src="http://lh6.ggpht.com/-QfRIZB_MCEI/Uf26B_6x65I/AAAAAAAAAaM/kvhXQfID8bY/tv2%25255B1%25255D.png?imgmax=800" width="335" /></a></div>
Jay Dukehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15329005721647143286noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139039015033528047.post-12413768344942388502013-07-28T17:45:00.002-04:002013-07-28T17:45:52.419-04:00Season 1, Episode 8: “The Big Heist” – Originally Aired 3-30-1979<i>In which the Dukes pull off a non-robbery…</i><br />
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<i><span style="color: red;"><b>First off, I want to apologize for the lateness of this post. I’ll try not to make a habit of it.</b></span></i><br />
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We open with a car parking in front of the Hazzard County courthouse. A guy gets out and starts trimming the hedges, looking nervous while doing so. Rosco pulls up to the sign near this guy’s car and removes a piece of tape from it, revealing that the “Parking” sign was really a “No Parking sign all along!<br />
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Hedgeman dons a ski mask and rushes into Boss’ office, where he’s counting out illegal moonshine money. He demands Boss fill a sack with the money and runs off, only to find his car has been towed. Panicking, he jumps into a passing General Lee, which Boss sees, and thus assumes the robber was Bo, as Luke is driving. Boss tells Rosco to arrest the Dukes, because of course he does.<br />
The robber kicks Bo and Luke out of the General Lee and is quickly pursued by a police car, so he pulls into the Boar’s Nest and quickly stashes the money in the back of what turns out to be Uncle Jesse’s truck. Inside, the Robber, whose name turns out to be Neil Bishop, meets Daisy, and it’s implied that they want to fuck each other. <br />
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Meanwhile, Rosco comes upon Bo and Luke and demands to know where the money and car are. They tell him about Neil, but of course he refuses to believe them, so they run away. Bo says he knows a shortcut, and they run down the side of a riverbed, only to be foiled by Rosco standing on the bridge that runs over said river. He then arrests them.<br /> <br />
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Rosco stops for gas and is accosted by a kid holding a very real looking water pistol. Bo and Luke play along with him and convince Rosco this kid is a midget and part of their gang. They use this opportunity to run off, and Rosco gets a face full of water for his troubles.<br />
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Bo and Luke stop by the Boar’s Nest in an attempt to take Daisy’s car, but she tells them she drove Jesse’s truck. They take it, and tell her to have Jesse meet them at one of their old still sites. Inside, Neil looks pretty upset at his money driving off, and schemes Daisy into letting him stay at the farm for the night.<br />
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The boys get to the still site and tell Jesse what’s going on, he ad vises them that there’s no evidence, and thus no case. Rosco, Enos, and Boss conveniently appear and say they DO have evidence, namely some stray bills and the ski mask Neil had left in the General Lee. So, they arrest the boys, and Uncle Jesse says, and I quote, “I’ll be down to see you as soon as I finish my chores!” What the hell? Your nephews are being falsely arrested and you’ve gotta finish some shit up? Priorities, man!<br /> <br />
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Jesse, Daisy, and Neil arrive at the farm. Daisy is freaking out about the boys being falsely arrested, saying she’s going to get her bow and arrows to do some country vengeance. I don’t get that, she’s not on probation, she can go in with guns blazing if she wants to! Jesse tells her to calm the fuck down, he’s got shit under control.<br />
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Neil is introduced to Uncle Jesse, who agrees to let him stay in the boys’ room, as they’re in jail and all. Meanwhile, Neil is eyeing up the back of the truck with the sack of money in it, and offers to unload the truck for Jesse so he can get over to the jail faster. This is apparently not suspicious at all! Jesse gets to the jail just in time for another exciting episode of Jesse Duke: Back-Porch Lawyer! He and the boys determine that Neil is the guy that pulled off the robbery! The complete stranger who rolled into town and gained all of the main characters’ trust turned out to be the villain? Now I’ve seen everything! Uncle Jesse then rushes out to warn Daisy.<br />
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Bo calls Enos over and tells Enos that they’re ready to confess. He takes them into an office and sits down to type up their confession, and somehow (the scene cuts away to some bullshit between Neil and Daisy that’s not worth mentioning) they end up cuffing him to a chair, rag tied in his mouth, shoved into a corner. They then leave before things go in an unsettling direction. <br /> <br />
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At the farm, Neil grabs the money and tries to make his escape, but Daisy has figured out the ruse, and threatens him with a shotgun. He grabs it when Jesse gets home and ushers them into the house. Meanwhile, Rosco and Boss look for Enos, and they can’t find him, despite being in the same room. They don’t even look behind the door, and he, for some reason, doesn’t even try and make a noise.<br />
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Bo and Luke get to the farm, and are corralled into the living room with the rest of the family, where Neil explains that he’s no thief, Boss is! He only robbed Boss because he was sold some faulty goods, and didn’t have time to count the money, so he just took it all. The Dukes believe him, and, once Neil reveals that it’s illegal money, decide to call in their old revenuer friend, Harvey Essex. Why they don’t call Huntley back in is unexplained, maybe she got the fuck out after her embarrassing adventures in Episode 5.<br />
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So they hatch a plan to have Bo re-rob Boss, and Luke has the revenuer stand outside to catch Boss when he comes outside yelling about his liquor money being stolen. They do so, and there’s this ridiculous scene where the General Lee is driving around on its passenger-side wheels, which just looks like it’s really bad for the car. I can’t imagine that there’s any sort of practical use. Bo gives Boss the money sack back so he will have it when he runs outside. <br /> <br />
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So Boss runs out and is busted. The Dukes and Neil celebrate, and give Neil their reward money. Bo mentions that they forgot about Enos, who by my count has been tied up for about 2 days. Then they laugh about it, not caring that their friend is probably dead, and drenched in his own waste.<br /> <br />
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Jay Dukehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15329005721647143286noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9139039015033528047.post-54184263234594919562013-07-20T17:23:00.001-04:002013-07-20T17:23:15.838-04:00Season 1, Episode 7: “Luke’s Love Story” – Originally Aired 3-16-1979<i>In which a girl enters a derby, and Luke falls in love…</i><br />
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At the Boar’s Nest, the Balladeer tells us about the Annual Hazzard Obstacle Derby, a super dirty, super illegal race, but not so illegal that it doesn’t have the full sponsorship of the police force and county commissioner.<br />
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Cooter bursts through the door on a motorcycle, wearing his beloved “Dukes of Hazzard Crew” jacket, and looking like an honest-to-goodness crazy person. <br />
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He’s arrived with the race’s trophy in tow, which means that Rosco can announce the lineup for the race, but first he tells Cooter to get the goddamned motorcycle out of the bar; Cooter responds by basically throwing the bike outside.<br />
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Rosco finally get around to announcing the racers: Enos, Cooter, Luke, and Amy Creavy, a <b>girl! </b>Many a joke is made about how girls can’t race, and Luke introduces himself. They are then introduced to Frankie, Amy’s mechanic, who is also female, and in possession of a pretty hilarious voice: she talks like she’s got a wad of phlegm the size of a baseball lodged in her head.<br />
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Daisy offers the women a drink on the house, and then we see a couple of guys leering at them from over in the corner. They’re Turk Foley and his pal, who I’m going to call J.D. <br />
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Turk wanders over and tries to get Amy to come talk to him, dragging her off. Luke intervenes, and gets a punch in the face for his troubles. Boss and Rosco sit and watch the fight for a minute, and then Boss reluctantly tells Rosco to break it up. Turns out Turk used to be Amy’s mechanic, but she fired him for putting nitrous oxide in her engine and because he wouldn’t accept Amy’s romantic rejections.<br />
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Boss tells Rosco that he needs to win the race at any cost, and when Rosco asks why, Boss reveals that his mother’s ashes are sealed inside the trophy, and thus needs to get the trophy back permanently (the trophy is yours to keep if you win in four times, not three, as Boss had assumed). He tells Rosco to make sure he does.<br />
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Daisy has offered to let Amy and Frankie stay with the Dukes, as the local hotel is full. Bo and Luke find out about this by getting undressed for bed and the girls pop up out of their beds. Daisy says she left a note in the bathroom, but Bo says he was too busy shitting to read a note.<br />
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The next morning, Bo and Frankie head into town, leaving Luke and Amy to make out and talk about crankshafts or something. Bo stops by the garage and finds Turk messing around under the hood of Amy's car, which is stored at the garage for some reason. Turk and J.D. beat up Bo until he throws a ton of oil at them until they run off. Rosco appears and Bo explains what was going on, and Rosco tells Bo to stop harassing the tourists.<br />
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Frankie comes in and sees Bo poking around to see what Turk did, and accuses him of sabotage. He gets all pissed and bets her $50 that Amy won’t even finish the race. She one ups him and proposes putting The General Lee up against their car, Lucifer, winner takes the loser’s car. He agrees. Some time later, he goes to talk to Uncle Jesse about it, as he is feeling terribly guilty about the whole thing, as General Lee is only half his, the other half belongs to Luke. After a long talk, he advises Bo to call off the bet.<br />
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Meanwhile, Luke tries to convince Amy to back out of the race, as the guys in the race play dirty, and she tells him to back off, she’ll be fine. He continues to protest, so she takes him for a drive in Lucifer to show him how capable she is. They drive, and everything goes fine until her brakes give out, and they nearly go over a cliff before narrowly swerving off to the side. Luke discovers that Turk has poked the brake lines full of holes. She tells Luke she still won’t quit, and then it’s implied they fuck in or around the car.<br />
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At the Boar’s Nest, Bo tries to call off the bet, but Frankie won’t let him. Seems like this is just a verbal thing, and, as he doesn’t really own the car, she can’t really hold him to it, but he lets the bet remain on instead of telling her to go to hell. Luke and Amy talk over their relationship, Luke stating that he wants to get serious, but that he still wants to be free to fuck whoever he wants. She rightfully tells him to go fuck himself, and leaves with some random guy.<br /> <br />
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Daisy collects cigarette butts in a a pail, and after a scuffle, the racing trophy ends up spilled into the pail full of ashes. Boss Hogg is understandably upset.<br /> <br />
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That night, Luke has a long talk with Uncle Jesse about the Amy situation, and he eventually is convinced to give up his man-whore ways. The next morning, he tells Amy about it, but quickly admits that it’d never work, as once you’re a pussy hound, you’re a pussy hound all the way. She breaks it off with him, again, and storms outside, where Frankie reveals Bo’s stupid “bet the General Lee” plan.<br />
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During the race, it’s revealed that Turk had knocked Cooter out and is racing in his car, trying to take out Amy. Luke comes to her aid when he sees that it’s Turk instead of Cooter, and Amy wins the race. Frankie demands the keys to General Lee,. and Bo explains to Luke about the bet. Rosco arrests Turk, and Luke tells Amy that he let her win. She’s mad and lets Luke take her trophy, saying she’ll come back and win it fair next year. Frankie gives Bo the keys back, and Luke keeps the trophy on the mantle as a reminder of how getting his dick wet cost him the love of a woman.<br /> <br />
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Jay Dukehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15329005721647143286noreply@blogger.com0